


Heart Like Yours

by amongtheshadows



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Awesome Peggy Carter, Beard Burn, Bearded Steve Rogers, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Blow Jobs, Bottom Bucky, Boyfriends, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Has Cats, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes Returns, Cats, Clintasha - Freeform, Emotional Sex, Emotions, F/M, Hugs, Hurt Steve Rogers, M/M, Past Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Porn with Feelings, Protective Steve, Recovery, Rough Sex, Steve Feels, Steve Needs a Hug, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Switching, emotional Steve, sad Steve, steve loves love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-27
Updated: 2015-05-19
Packaged: 2018-03-03 19:50:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 34,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2885378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amongtheshadows/pseuds/amongtheshadows
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Hello?”</p><p>“Steve?” Barton’s voice spoke over others in the background.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“We got him.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Found

Steve didn’t usually sleep with his cell phone next to his bed, or in his bedroom at all for that matter. It usually sat in its place next on the outlet in the kitchen where it wouldn’t bother him, but tonight was different. Steve had spoken to Natasha that morning, who was on a mission with Clint. They were looking for HYDRA traces in old labs and construction sites and had come across old data about Steve and login records from the last 75 years. 

“What does that mean?” He had asked when she called from a payphone outside of Rome that morning. 

“It means we can see everyone who has logged in or tried to login to see information about you.” She had stated simply. He knew there was something that she wasn’t telling him. 

“Natasha, what are you getting at?”

“He tried to login yesterday in the Paris lab, and two weeks ago in Berlin, and five weeks ago in Frankfurt.” 

“Who tried to?”

She paused and Steve could hear her turn her head, most likely looking at Clint for approval before continuing. “We have a map that leads us directly to Bucky.” Steve swore his heart stopped right there in his kitchen. He carefully placed the knife he was using down next to his forgotten bowl of oatmeal and walked to the window and sighed.

“Nat. . .”

“Steve, we’re going for it. He’s not only a valuable asset for figuring out the rest of this HYDRA crap but he’s one of yours. We aren’t going to waste this opportunity.”

“Thank you.” Was all he could say.

“Don’t worry about it. Barton will call when we have updates. Don’t wait up. If anything happens and we do get our hands on him, Stark already has a room in his lab that he’s making up for him just in case.”

“He could stay with me.” Steve said weakly.

“We both know that he’s probably not in the best of shape, and if we do get our hands on him we have no idea how he’ll react. Not right away Steve, but soon. I promise.”He barely had a chance to whisper out a thank you before he heard the dial tone. He just stood there looking out his window at the city below. 

They had Bucky. Natasha wouldn’t have called him unless she was confident. She wouldn’t put him through that kind of torture. They had tried to find him before on missions. After SHIELD was dismantled there was still a lot of HYDRA mess to clean up, which Steve had wanted to taken on personally. There had been recovered files with possible locations and sources of information in the US and Europe but every time they looked close he vanished. It was more and more painful each time, watching him float away in the wind. It had been hard on Steve, everyone could see that. It’s part of the reason he moved into the tower. He lived on the second highest floor, under Tony and above Bruce, where he was constantly visited by the other Avengers and had JARVIS to help him catch up.

It was a struggle for Steve to get through the rest of the day after he pulled away from sulking at the window. He suited up and got ready for the day just like he normally did and rode the elevator down the the common room floor where Tony was waiting for him. He was having a hushed discussion with Pepper when he walked in and they both dropped whatever they were talking about as soon as they saw him. They looked at him sympathetically as he walked in and logged himself into the Stark database. 

“Natasha already filled me in. No need to look so concerned.” he said with a weak smile as he pulled up maps that they were going to use to work that day.

Pepper spoke first. Grabbing her files off the table that she was leaning against she walked to Steve and hugged him quickly. “It’s going to be alright. Even if you don’t believe it yet.” She said and patted his arm before boarding the elevator and waving at Tony. He waved back gently and then turned to Steve, who was still facing the screen.

“I’d get it if you wanted to take some time off today.”

“Today is a normal day. I’d like to treat it like one.” he said without moving his eyes from the screen.

“Okay.” he agreed and moved to the island behind a workbench and poured himself a mug of coffee. There was long silence between the two men and Steve was weary about breakinging it but after several moments his curiosity got the best of him.

“Natasha said that you have room set aside in the lab for him.” 

“Yea. Its monitored 24/7 by anyone that I give access to really and is close enough that if anything happens we’re right there. It was originally for Banner but. . .”

Steve just turned and nodded his head. “Thank you for your efficiency.”

Tony nodded as he took a sip of his coffee. “Something’s bothering you. Spill.” he said and sat down in one of the office chairs that was around the conference table.

“I’m worried this time.”

“Have you not been before.”

“No I have, I just. . . Natasha called me and told me. She wouldn’t have done that unless she was positive that he could be there. It might happen this time. He might come back, but then if he does will he remember me? What if he was wiped again? What if the lab room sets him off? What if he’s hurt and we can’t do anything about it? What do we do then?” 

Tony nodded and placed his mug on the table before standing. “Jarvis pull up file clip 180B.” he said and a video player came up on the screen. He tapped it and a video surveillance feed started playing. 

“What is this?” Steve asked and studied the crowds of people moving around.

“Its a surveillance feed from your Smithsonian unit in DC. This is about three days after they found you on the bank of the Potomac.” 

He played if for a few more seconds before stopping it and zooming in. “You see that? Right there?” he asked and pointed at the screen. Zooming in more he saw Bucky’s memorial plaque. There was a crowd in front of it paying their respect to the only fallen Howling Commando, leaving American flags and roses at its base. Tony fast forwarded another thirty seconds and Steve watch the crown melt away until there was only one body in front of it. Tony huffed out a breath and turned the image on the screen so it was a different camera angle and focused the man’s face. 

Steve’s breath caught in his throat when he saw what was undeniably Bucky’s face staring intently at the memorial. He looked from Tony to the screen and back again. There was a lump in his throat that he swallowed down as Tony sighed.

“Nat found it and sent it to me last night. It was part of a HYDRA facial recognition program that they used for the Winter Soldier so that they could always track him. It’s what made her want to go after him. If they hadn't gotten him by that point there’s no way in hell they have him now.”

Steve only nodded and looked back at Bucky’s face on the screen. 

He left it up in a separate window for the rest of the day as he and Tony continued their work from the previous day. He would leave to go get more coffee or to fetch a tool out of the lab and Steve would sneak up and open it to look at his face. Steve was thankful for the distraction of work, otherwise he would have had to sit around his house waiting all day for something that might not happen, that might never happen. 

Tony was proud of himself when he made Steve smile and even laugh lightly a few times throughout the day and he made sure to have Pepper bring home takeout for the three of them to eat together once it was dark and they were finally done working for the day. She caught onto Tony’s “hey let’s cheer up cap” vibe and smiled more than usual and told stories about Tony that weren't exactly flattering, but made Steve smile nonetheless. But after sometime it was finally reasonable to thank his hosts and excuse himself to ride the elevator back home. 

Steve went through his bedtime routine just like he normally did. Hung up his uniform, put his boots by the door, turned out all the lights, brushed his teeth, and turned the radio off. The only difference this night was that he left his cell phone next to his bed just in case. Just in case something went wrong and they had to let him know. 

For all he knew they could be back now. Clint and Natasha could be injured. Bucky could be with them. He might have gotten away though. He might have taken information from them and left. Back to whoever was in charge of him. But was anyone in charge of him? The way he looked on the security feed from his memorial exhibit didn’t make him look like he was on a mission. And HYDRA couldn’t be that blind to send him into a place where his memories could resurface. That meant that he went on his terms. That he remembered. That he walked through the exhibit and saw the displays and the pictures of Brooklyn, and of Steve’s mom, and of the other Howling Commandos. That had to trigger something. 

Steve prayed it would. The thoughts running through his mind were on a loop. Never ending, never slowing down. Constant crescendoing noise only to be cut by the shrill of a ringing phone.

Steve just turned his head on his pillow, looking at the phone in wonder. It was on its third ring before his brain processed that he needed to pick it up. That he could deal with whatever news was on the other side. 

“Hello?”

“Steve?” Barton’s voice spoke over others in the background.

“Yes.”

“We got him.”


	2. Chapter 2

Steve hung up his phone and flipped on the light on the side of his bed. He walked passed his suit and shield, having already decided once again that he was not going to fight Bucky and that it might relax him to see Steve as a civilian and not a threat. He moved as fast as he could as he pulled on jeans and shirt before grabbing a jacket and his boots and heading out the door, only stopping when a picture caught his eye.

It was a small black and white picture that had been the the Winter Soldier file that Natasha had given him him after they “buried” Fury. It was of Bucky was all smiles in his army uniform was he first enlisted, before Zola ever got to him. Steve had a habit of looking at it before he left on missions; using it as a reminder of why he was doing his job. Of what he was protecting, of what could be lost. 

He got in the elevator and walked rode down to the communal floor that Tony’s lab was attached to. He heard voices as the elevator got closer and closer and when the doors opened he looked up to see Natasha and Clint waiting on the couch. They stood in unison and Clint approached him first, clapping him on the shoulder. 

“We got him.” He said once more. Natasha moved forward and pulled him into a hug and kissed his cheek quickly.

“Thank you so much.” he said and squeezed her shoulder as she pulled away. “Are you okay?”

“Surprisingly, yes.” Clint said and looked at Nat.

“We found him just outside of Berlin, trying to get into the Hydra lab again. According to his searches he wanted more information about the war.” she said and nodded towards the door that lead to the lab. 

“He didn’t put up a fight.” she said and lead the three of them back to the lab where Tony was working on his computer outside of two frosted glass doors. “We explained who we were and he agreed to come.”

“He did what?” Steve asked. 

“He didn’t fight back. He certainly wasn’t ready to accept the whole idea but we promised his we would give him answers to all of his questions if he was cooperative.”

“He must have decided it was worth it.” Clint finished from his place sitting on on the lab benches. 

“How is he?” Steve asked. His chest was tight and he didn’t know how to react to the fact that he was in the same building as Bucky. That he was just beyond those glass doors. 

“Honestly, pretty bad shape.” Tony said and closed his computer and stood up. “According to Bruce he’s severely dehydrated and malnourished. Has a broken rib and a few jammed fingers, but nothing crazy serious.”

“Bruce?”

“He knows how to provide care for people in bad shape like this. I called him when Clint said they were on the way back.”

Steve could only nod at that as he kept his gaze on the glass doors. Every few seconds he would see the reflection of someone moving or a light being shadowed by a figure. His stomach fluttered knowing one of those was Bucky. 

“You can go in, Steve. It’s alright.” Natasha said quietly and Steve broke his gaze to smile weakly and nod his head at her. 

Tony stepped in front of him and held the door open. Steve nodded and followed him in. He walked into what looked like a makeshift interrogation room. A large window of glass was mounted on the wall a computer panel sat in front of it. Tony tapped on a few buttons and Steve heard the doors lock behind them. 

“Safety protocol. Sorry.” he explained, but Steve didn’t hear him. He was too focused on what was happening on the other side of the glass. 

There was a cot placed on the left side of the white walled room. Bucky was sitting on the edge of it with his arms outstretched in front of him. Bruce was sitting on a stool in front of him drawing blood out of his veins. He looked straight ahead at first, but then down again when Bruce extracted the needle from his skin. He looked up and said something to Bucky who just needed. 

He looked tired. There were bags under his eyes and he had bruises up and down his flesh arm that sat limply now on Bruce's knee. His metal arm was relaxed on his other side and Steve didn’t miss the flinch that racked his body when Bruce accidentally bumped it when he moved to stand. He began work on hanging and IV fluid bag above the cot. 

“Why is he doing that?” Steve asked quietly.

“Dehydrated. Probably going to pump him with vitamins and essentials he’s missing too. Pepper’s getting some Gatorade for him now.” Tony explained. Steve nodded and watched and Bruce started the IV in the back of Bucky’s hand. He didn’t even flinch as he put it in and taped it down over the bruised flesh. Placing the tape back in the medical bag he had at his feet he said something to Bucky who nodded. Bruce stood and walked toward the door. Tony pressed a button on the control panel and it buzzed and opened to let him in. 

“How is he?” Steve asked as soon as the door shut.

“He’ll be completely fine. He just needs some essential nutrients that he’s been deprived of. He’s fine though. Nothing physical to worry about.” he said. Steve nodded his head again. He knew Bucky’s mental state would be in shambles after everything he had been through, that he had expected even before he had known that he would be found. 

“Can I go in?” he asked and Bruce nodded his head. 

“Just be careful.” he warned.

Steve only nodded as the door buzzed to unlock. He pulled it open and walked into the small room, eyes fixed on Bucky. His eyes shifted from staring at the needle in the back of his hand to Steve. A flicker of recognition swept across his face and he sat straight up.

Steve ignored the nervous tightening in his chest and pulled the stool that Bruce had been using, closer to him and sat down so that there was enough space between them. 

“Hi.” he said quietly, eyes locked on Bucky’s. He didn’t say anything back and Steve took it as a sign to keep going. “Thank you for coming. I’m really glad you did, Buck.”

“You call me that.” he stated back at Steve as soon as the name fell out of his mouth. 

“Yea, I always have.”

“I remembered, bits, you were there. It was winter and we were in the mountains.” he said slowly, like he was trying to make sense of it as it came out of his mouth. “There were others. Who were they?”

“They were our team. People used to call us the ‘Howling Commandos’. You and I, we were in charge.” Steve spoke slowly to let Bucky process.

“When?”

“During the war. 1943.” he said and Bucky nodded once. “Is that why you were looking at the HYDRA sites?” he asked.

Bucky nodded. “I saw you. You were my mission, and I remembered. I wanted to know more. They wiped me, but I remembered pieces and things. None of it made sense.” 

“Did you find anything?” Steve asked.

“A lot about you. They don’t like you.” he said and adverted his gaze back down to the floor. “They tried to take you out multiple times but it never worked so they sent me in. They used what made you to make me.” he said and looked down at the metal arm. “I have a file there. About what happened. They got me and started testing but you pulled me out. We kept fighting but then I got separated on a mission and they found me again and began procedure.”

“That’s right.” Steve said, ignoring the lump in his throat. He wasn’t expecting him to talk this much, to know this much information. Bucky looked back up at Steve and swallowed hard.

“What now?” 

“I’m not entirely sure. The people that brought you in are friends of mine, Natasha and Clint. Your doctor is as well, Bruce. This tower is our friend Tony’s. We work together and we all live here so I’ll be here if you need me at any time, but for now I think they want to monitor you here.” he said, not really sure how to explain the Avengers Initiative. “Tonight they’re going to bring you food and medicine to help you rest and get better. They’re probably going to bring vitamin pills, Bruce really likes those, and Gatorade, which is like juice only it doesn’t taste as good. You should take everything they give you.”

Bucky nodded and moved to scratch the back of his head, his hair swinging in his face as he did so. Steve watched him move, slouching and sighing, looking around the room. It was all so familiar, so Bucky. He yawned and rubbed his eyes as he opened his mouth to try and ask another question and Steve couldn’t help but smile. 

“Go to sleep. I’ll come back in the morning.” he said and Bucky nodded. “Do you want anything?” he asked and Bucky shook his head again. 

“Alright, well if you think of anything let Bruce know and he’ll tell me.” Steve said as he stood. He resisted the urge to reach out and touch Bucky, thinking it might be too much for the first day. “Goodnight Bucky.” He said and grabbed the door handle, waiting to be let out. 

“Thank you.” Bucky said from his cot. 

“Anytime, pal.” he said as the door buzzed. He smiled and hung his head as he walked out, letting the door shut and click behind him. The observation room was empty, which he was grateful for. He let out a deep breath and as he exhaled he couldn’t help but let a tear escape from the corner of his eye. 

He moved to sit in one of the chairs that was place in front of the panel and looked through the window at Bucky. He was curled up on his side, already falling asleep, his chest moving steadily as he drifted off. 

He had remember pieces. He had remembered him. At least that was a start. He could’ve not know anything, been completely oblivious. But that was Bucky in there. He was strong, and smart, and had seen enough hell for several lifetimes. He had been tortured and beaten and killed and taken away from everything that he knew. But know he was safe. In the tower with Steve watching over him, nothing bad could happen here, which is what he needed. What he deserved.


	3. Chapter 3

_Italy, 1943_

_“Bucky I swear to god if you aren’t more careful I-” Steve was cut of by a kiss._

_He had been pacing around his barracks for hours, trying to work, while he waited for Bucky to return from a mission. He was later than he expected to be when he radioed in at dinner and said they’d be home by ten. It was one in the morning now and Steve was in the middle of quietly ranting to him about how irresponsible it was to not radio it in that he was taking a different trail back._

_Bucky pulled away and grabbed his hips. “I’m sorry I kept you up, and I’m sorry I didn’t let you know I’d take longer. Now will you please come to bed we have to be up in five hours.” he said and kissed his neck gently._

_Steve just sighed. He did have a reason not to call. If their lines were being watched it would have been impossible for them to take the normal way back to camp. They would have been intersected in the dark and with no defense planned on the narrow trail there’s no way they would have made it out alive._

_“You’re right I’m sorry. I just worry.”_

_“What’s new.” Bucky sighed and he kissed him again before walking over to the two conjoined cots they had out together to make their bed. No one ever came in without permission so this was really the only place they could be together without having to worry. Steve laughed as he kicked off his boots and climbed in behind Bucky, pulling him in close as he kept them warm. He ran his hand absentmindedly up and down his bare arms as he drifted off with his ear pressed to his bicep that he was currently using as a pillow._

_“I like it when you touch me like that.” he said quietly._

_“It’s nice.”_

_“I’ll keep doing it then.” he said and kissed his ear as he fell asleep._

*

It had been a week since Bucky had been brought in by Natasha and Clint. He had been staying in the lab where he could be observed and treated. After countless psych evaluations and medical tests that left Bucky anxious and exhausted he was no longer deemed a threat and was able to have reading materials as well as a radio in the room with him. Steve had made a habit of coming to visit every morning with breakfast and then again every evening with dinner. Some days he could get Bucky to talk about what he remembered, whether it be from the war or of what HYDRA did to him, and some days he could barely lift his head off the pillow to look at him.

Either way, Steve sat in the chair he had put by the bed and told him about his day. He told him about the computer that he and Stark were working on, he told him about sparring practice with Natasha, he even told him about how he tried doing yoga with Bruce to relax. That day he had made him smile. But with every leap came a fall, Steve knew that.

He just didn’t expect the falls to come so hard.

He had been called in one night by Bruce who had been called in by Tony when he had started acting up one night. Steve had ridden the elevator up immediately and made his way to the lab. As soon as the doors opened he ran to the lab where Bruce and Tony were watching through the glass of the observation panel. Bucky was sitting against the far wall, looking at his metal arm. He face was red and splotchy, like he had been crying, and his radio was smashed to bits next to his bed.

“What the hell did you do to him?” Steve said as he took in the sight.

“We didn’t do anything.” Tony said, not moving his eyes from the glass.

“I suggested that he listen to some music to help calm himself down after his psych evaluation today. Something played that triggered something within him.” Bruce answered. “It’s a panic attack. He needs to calm down.”

“Let me in.”

“Steve I can’t let you do that. He’s a ticking time bomb, he’s fragile. If he as even a second of a flashback and remembers you as a mission you’ll be gone before we can even open the door.”

“I don’t care. That’s my friend.” Steve said and placed his hand on the door handle and looked back at Tony. “Put me in.” he said. The handle buzzed beneath his palm and he pulled the door open. The door slammed behind him as he pressed his back against the wall across from Bucky. He looked up from his arm to Steve.

“Why did they let you in here?” he asked.

“I wanted to see if you were okay.” he said and looked at the chair that was placed across from Bucky. He took a slow step forward to go to sit in it. Bucky didn’t seem to care, or notice, and Steve took another step before pulling it back and sitting across from him. “Are you okay?” he asked.

“I don’t know.” he said and tried to smile by lifting up one corner of his mouth. Steve saw his attempt and smiled back, giving him full reassurance that he was able to understand his attempt at emotion.

“What happened?”

“I don’t know.” he said and swallowed thickly. “I listen to music a lot but today there was a different song on. They were playing a song from a long time ago.” Steve just nodded and leaned towards him, encouraging him to keep talking. “It scared me.” he said. Steve didn’t miss the rumble in his lip as he looked away.

“That’s completely understandable.” Steve said.

“I feel bad.”

“Why?”

“I broke Bruce’s radio. He gave it to me.” he said. Steve smiled and looked at the broken radio on the ground.

“That’s okay. It’s just a radio, there’s lots of those nowadays. We’ll have no problem getting him another one.”

“He won’t be angry?” Bucky asked timidly.

“Not at all.” he said. Bucky sighed and nodded and looked around the room as if he was coming out of a haze. He shook his head and puffed out a sigh before looking back at Steve.

“It’ll be okay.” Steve said and reached out to touch Bucky’s knee. At first he froze, looking at the hand like it was a bomb ready to go off. His eyes flashed back up to Steve, who kept a smile on his face, and back to to hand hand. After assessing it and deciding it wasn’t a threat he sighed again and leaned back against the wall behind him. He started taking deep breaths and Steve could see the tension in his shoulders start to relax.

Steve dared to make another move and started to rub circles on his knee with his thumb over the cotton of the pants he was wearing. Bucky didn’t move, if anything he relaxed further. Steve watched as his breaths became even as he opened his eyes lazily. He looked so much like he did before the war it almost scared Steve. His grey eyes half open, staring idly at him.

“I have a question.” he said quietly.

“Yea.”

“Were we ever. . .Did we. . .I have memories of you. Touching me. Like this.” he said gazed uncertainly at Steve.

“You alway liked contact.” he answered and continued to rub his thumb over his knee.

“I like it when you touch me like this.” he said quietly.

“I’ll keep doing it then.” he said, not missing the fact that they had the same conversation seventy two years ago. As Bucky fell asleep he watched his eyes twitch and his nose scrunch up the way it always did. He woke himself up as he started to fall over and decided that the best option was to lay down. His head hit the pillow and he was out. Steve watched him sleep peacefully, feeling more peaceful himself knowing he had remembered them. He didn’t want to bring it up but he didn’t have to. Bucky remembered and now it was his job to make sure he didn’t forget again.


	4. Chapter 4

Things were getting easier for Steve and Bucky. After three months they were best friends. Bucky had been in psychotherapy and physical therapy along with SHIELD briefings and meditation and even yoga with Bruce. He was eating and sleeping and had established himself as a functional, living, breathing, human man. 

Steve didn’t go on any mission while Buck was there. He didn’t leave for more than five or six hours and always made sure to have breakfast with him every morning and dinner with him every evening. 

“Hey, Buck.” Steve said as he entered his room. The door buzzed behind him as he set down two cups of coffee and two bagels on the table next to his bed. He stood to help him as he pulled up the chair to the other side of the table.

“Hello.” he said as he said down and picked up one of the coffee cups. He sniffed the contents before taking a sip and sighing. Steve hadn’t heard any noises of content out of him yet and he smiled as he sat down across from him. 

“Good?”

“Yes, very.” he answered. 

“I’m glad you like it.” he said as he took a bit of his bagel. “How was your evaluation?” he asked. Bucky was talking to a psychiatrist and SHIELD agents everyday so that he could recover as well as tell them what he knew about HYDRA. 

“It was good. They said they were able to find the lab I was telling you about in Germany. I also might be able to leave soon.” he said, not looking of from his bagel. Steve ignored the second half of his statement as he swallowed. 

“That’s great. I know everyone here really appreciates your help.” he said and gave him a warm smile. The corner of Bucky’s mouth turned up, a great improvement compared to when he first arrived weeks ago. “Where do you want to go when you’re allowed to leave?” Steve asked cautiously. He knew this was coming, he just wasn’t ready to talk about it yet. He figured he might as well pull of the band aid while he had time before it was too late and he was gone. He held his breath as he awaited his response. He swallowed and looked back up Steve. 

“I spoke with Bruce and he recommended I stay here. That was I can be close in case. . .” his eyes dropped. 

“You can always stay with me.” Steve said warmly, trying to take his mind off the negativity that had obviously entered his train of thought. . “I live two floors down, Bruce lives right below me. I’d be more than happy to have you.” he said fiddled with his fingers, waiting for his response.

“If you don’t mind. . .” Bucky said nervously.

“Not at all.”

*

Three hours later Bucky had moved onto Steve’s floor. His new radio and his clothes had been moved into the guest room along with him and Steve had made sure to text Tony and ask him if a larger variety of clothes could be sent up for him. An hour later ten boxes of all different kinds of clothes had been delivered at the door with a note from Tony, welcoming Bucky to the building. He showed it to Bucky who read it over and over again before putting it on the nightstand next to his bed. 

It was already dark as they finished and Steve sighed and sat on the bed next to Bucky after he had folded and put away the tenth sweatshirt Tony had sent. The lights from the city below flickered and Steve suppressed a yawn. 

“Thank you for helping me unpack.” Bucky said. 

“No problem. I’m just glad you're going to have your own space now. This place is yours now. Use anything that you need.” Steve said and gestured to the living room through the open door. When he put his hand down he realized that he put it down so close to Bucky’s that their pinky fingers were overlapping. They both froze and looked at each other out of the corner of their eyes and looked away. 

Steve was looking at the ground as he felt Bucky’s hand move. It slid under his so that his palm rested on the top of his hand. Steve sighed at the contact, feeling every crease and every pulse. 

“I’m sorry.” Bucky said suddenly. The hand was gone along with the warmth it brought. “I’m going to wash up.” he said and walked into his bathroom and shut the door. 

Steve just looked at the door as he heard the water start to run. He listened to the sound of the shower opening and closing as he stood and walked towards the kitchen to make them dinner. He opened the fridge to get something ready but he couldn’t bring himself to focus. 

He had no idea what had just happened. There was a chance that Buky remembered Steve for they way they were during the war; when they had finally been able to tell each other that they were in love. The way he allowed Steve to touch him, how he was able to speak calmly to him and ask him questions.

Maybe he did remember. 

It had been three months since Bucky had been brought in and Steve was confident in his friendship. The worked out together and ate together. Steve ran downstairs and when he had nightmares and sat at the window at watched him sleep after he had panic attacks. They talked about what had happened to the both of them in their time apart. They had been thrown apart and broken down but somehow they ended up here. Maybe it was meant to be.

He closed the fridge and leaned against the counter, head in his hands. He didn’t know what to think, or to do for that matter. On one hand he could pretend it never happened and just keeping being Bucky’s best friend just like he alway had been. Or, he could tell him. 

He could tell him how in love they were and that watching him “die” was the worst thing that ever happened to him. He could see if thats what he remembered. If he wanted Steve in that way. Steve punched the counter in frustration, sobering up a bit when the surface cracked under his fist. He pulled his hands away and flexed his knuckles looking for damage. 

When he looked up Bucky was leaning against the doorframe watching him with wide eyes. He had showered and was wearing a hooded sweatshirt and a SHIELD t shirt with a pair of jeans. His hair was pulled back into a bun and for the first time Steve was able to see all of his face. The stubble on his chin was dark against his pale skin and his eyes were bright as they stared at Steve.

“Sorry, I. . .”

“Are you okay?” he asked in a monotone voice. 

“Yea. I’m fine. Do you want dinner? I was thinking we could have some stuff Tony sent up." He lied and opened the fridge again. He needed to keep staying stuff to keep himself focused. He closed it and looked back at Bucky. "He hasn't sent it up yet, sorry. I forgot. We can do something else though. I have pasta?" He said and began rummaging through the cabinets, trying to not make eye contact with Bucky, who had moved to lean against the counter next to the indent of his fist. 

"Steve."

"Yea."

"What the hell are you doing?" He asked. His eyebrows furrowed and he looked at Steve they way he used to before the war when Steve would say something stupid. 

"What?"

"You're acting strange?" He said and gestured to the broken countertop. 

"I just got frustrated. Sorry if I scared you." 

"You didn't scare me, not with that at least."

"What does that mean?" He asked with a small frown. 

"You're not acting like yourself. You're nervous.” he said and looked around. A little voice in the back of Steve’s noticed how quickly his military training clicked into action as he looked for a threat. When nothing was detected he looked back to Steve. “If it's me I can go somewhere else."

"No, god no please don't go." He said and reached towards Bucky. "Please don't." He asked desperately. 

"Then what is it." He seemed frustrated. "I've been here for three months and I'd like think I’ve got my head on on straight, or at least it's as straight as it'll go."

"No, you. . . You're right." He sighed and took a step closer. "Can I ask you something."

"Of corse." 

"What do you remember from during the war?"

"We were best friends. I got shipped out before you and you came along and. . ."

"Then what?"

Bucky faltered for a moment before sighing and looking away nervously. "Steve."

"Bucky."

"I'm wasn't sure." He said and his bottom lip began to shake. "I have flashes, of you, and me, of us and we were. . ."

"Together." Steve finished for him.

Bucky sighed and took a step closer to Steve. "I knew some part of my brain wanted you when I saw you but I wasn't sure if it was a memory or not and if it was if you would still want that."

"I'll always want it." He said. "I didn't want you to feel like you had to remember, like you had to want it again." Steve said as he felt his heart rate accelerate. 

"I remember you." He said and reached out to touch his face. Steve sighed at the touch and took a step closer. He couldn't help the tear the slipped out and let him wipe it away. 

"I love you Bucky Barnes. Always have, always will." He said slowly, letting the words absorb. 

"Steve."

“I’ve always known Buck, but you deserve the chance to fall in love again.” Steve paused and took a hand in his own. "You don't have to say it back. I just want you to know."

Bucky sighed and smiled, really smiled and took a step closer to Steve so that they were chest to chest. “Thank you.” he said. Steve moved to press their foreheads together.

“Can I kiss you?”

Bucky nodded as he pushed his lips towards Steve’s. They collided and Steve swore he had never felt more alive. His pulse raced as Bucky’s lips pulsed against his own. He didn’t know how long he had felt so numb until his energy grew as he connected with Bucky. He felt himself shake slightly as he grabbed at Bucky’s waist, wrapping his arms around his core. 

Bucky wasted no time in pulling himself near to Steve. He brought a hand up to run through the back of Steve’s hair and hold his face in front of him. He pulled and made Steve whine in his mouth, which initially caused him to pull away but when Steve followed his mouth he realized he liked it. 

While both were slightly more than human, they still needed to breathe eventually. They pulled apart and Bucky rested his head against Steve’s shoulder, one hand still playing with the hair on the back of his neck, one wrapped tightly around his waist. 

Steve dropped his head to rest on Bucky’s, taking full advantage of his position to kiss the back of his skull. 

“Are you alright?” Bucky asked after a moment of standing in the kitchen. 

Steve just hummed contently as Bucky stood and placed a light kiss on his temple. “I don’t think I’ve ever been better.”  
“This isn’t going to be easy.” Bucky said after a moment.

“I know.”

“I’m- I’m not going to get better overnight. I might not ever be the same man you knew.”

“I don’t care. You are you, and that’s all that matters.”

Bucky just nodded as he pushed forward for another kiss. Steve smiled and took a risk and moved to put his hand on the back of his hand, under his hair. He obviously didn’t trigger anything and Buck moved his head closer to him. He smiled into the kiss which caused Bucky to smile and pull away.

“What?” 

“I’m just happy.”

“Me too.”

“Really?”

“Really.” and Steve believed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to use this chapter to get Buck and Steve together. Things may not get easier but I can promise a lot more Superboyfriend fluff in the future. Leave comments if you have any specifics you think might work!


	5. 5 pt. 1

"Captain Rogers." JARVIS spoke over the intercom, waking Steve from his sleep. 

"Yes?" He asked, throwing a hand over his face as he turned his light on. 

"I'm sorry to wake you but sergeant Barnes seems to be requesting your presence in the guest room. Should I notify him that you are unavailable?"

"No, no. I’m on my way." He said and shot out of bed, moving quickly though his room to the hall to Bucky's door. He didn't hesitate to pull it open and when he entered he saw Buck, sitting up against the headboard with his knees pulled up to his chest and the light next to his bed on. He was crying and nervously rubbing at his face watching Steve analyze the situation. 

"Hey, hey Buck." He said and moved to the edge of the bed. "What's up?"

"I, I just, remembered. In a bad way." He said and let out a small sob, rubbing his face more. Steve moved to kneel in front of him to the bed, reaching out to hold both of his hands in his own. “I remembered falling.” he said and looked up at Steve.

He froze. If had just been remembering the fall he is just reliving it now and feeling the side effects of losing Steve. If he was feeling anything that Steve had felt all those years ago. . . 

He didn’t deserve that. 

"Steve?" He asked and looked at their hands. Steve knew without having to hear him ask that he wanted to be held. During the war Steve needed to be held more than he would but every now and then Bucky would need to curl up against him. He always did and if everything else about his crave for contact was the same he hoped that this was too. Steve moved to sit next to him so that their sides were touching and let him fall into his lap, pulling his knees up and pressing his face into his shirt.

He sobbed into his chest and curled both hands lightly around his waist while Steve held his shoulders in one arm and his knees in another. He shook and trembled and stared off into the distance like it might give him some answers. It started to scare Steve when he started sobbing again and didn't realize he was still in his arms.

“Hey, hey, Buck come back to me. Breathe, breathe. That’s it, that’s good.” Steve chanted in his ear as he rocked them back and forth, listening to the sobs pouring out of his chest. He couldn’t help but let a few tears out of his own. He couldn't do anything to help his crying love in his arms. His face was red and splotchy and there were marks on his face and neck from nervously rubbing at the skin. He coughed out a sob and Steve ran a hand through his hair, leaning in to kiss his forehead. He left his cheek pressed to his forehead as he clutched at the fabric of Steve’s shirt. 

He could feel damp tears soaking through the thin material of his shirt as he buried himself in the warm comfort of his chest. He pulled him closer and dug his fingers into his skin, not harshly but just enough to let him know he wouldn’t slip away. 

“‘m sorry.” he said after another moment, sitting up slightly and wiping his eyes. 

Steve just kissed his temple and rested his cheek on the top of his head. “You never have to apologize.” there was another moment of silence and he let it calm them until Bucky’s eyelids started to feel heavy again and Steve had to stifle a yawn. “Do you want to come sleep with me?” he asked quietly. 

He nodded and interlaced their fingers as they stood, walking together down the hall to Steve’s room. He slid into bed first, watching Buck walk around and crawl in so that Steve could wrap himself around his body. He sighed and kissed the back of his neck. 

He like the feeling of sleeping next to Bucky, he always had. It was something that made him feel a little more at ease no matter how he was. It was constant, warm, love radiating mutually that made him feel like he was going to be okay. Like everything was going to be okay.


	6. 5 pt. 2

Steve woke up to the sound of the door to his room being opened. The sun had made its way into the sky and there was figure standing at the end of his bed. Bucky was still tucked safely against his chest. He sat up quickly after realizing it wasn’t him and saw Natasha eyeing them with a tilted head. He looked back down at Buck and back at Nat with cocked an eyebrow and gestured to the living room. He nodded and made his way behind her out of the room. Glancing back he made sure Bucky had enough of the duvet covering him and that that he kissed his forehead before leaving.

Natasha plopped down on one of the couches by the window and looked at Steve with the same cocked eyebrow ‘what the hell was that’ calm expression that she gave him in his room. 

“Good morning?”

“You and Barnes?”

“Me and Barnes.” he said leaned against the doorframe of his kitchen that connected to the living room. 

“How long?”

“Oh, I’d say about seventy three years now.” he said and smiled. Her face immediately softened and she smiled slightly. 

“Before the war?”

“During.”

She nodded and got up to move to his kitchen. She opened the cabinets and pulled out two cups and moved to make coffee on the island. “What made you finally decide to go for it?”

 

“I found him on a mission. HYDRA got him and started experiments already and almost didn’t make it. It made us realize we couldn’t live without each other.” he said and took a seat at the barstool on the other side of the counter. “We’re not in trouble, are we?”

“For once Steve Rogers, no you are not. Fury sent me down to ask you if it was something we should be aware of but I guess I didn’t need to ask. ” 

“Fury?” He asked and rolled his eyes. “Why would Fury. . .?”  
“He just wants to make sure he knows everything that’s going on.” she said and took a sip of her coffee. “Stark and Barton were also interested but that is irrelevant.”

“Were they really?”

“Yes they were, but like I said, irrelevant.”

“Did you?”

“Yes I did.” she said and poured more coffee.

“How did you all. . .” he gestured to find the right words.

“We could tell.” she said softly. “You love him, and he loves you and you two look at each other like you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to the universe. We want what’s best for you, for the both of you.”

Steve just smiled at that. It was a touchy subject, him and Bucky but he was glad that there was so much love coming from around them. It could have been worse. Everything that could have gone wrong still had a very high possibility of happening, and he knew that. It made everything more special. 

“We’re going to be okay.” he said and sighed.

“Yea, you are.” she said and put down her coffee cup as he phone beeped from her pocket. She pulled it out and smiled for a split second. She only ever smiled like that around Clint. Steve wondered if that’s how he looked around Bucky. All flushed cheeks and smiles.

“I have to run, but I’ll see you two later.” she said as she made her way to his front door.

“Tell Clint I said say hello.” he said and she turned and winked before leaving and shutting the door lightly behind her. Steve stood in the living room for a moment with his hands resting in the pockets of his pajama pants. He heard his bedroom door open and Buck appeared moments later, rubbing his eyes and pulling his hair back. Steve didn’t miss that one of his sweatshirts was draped over his shoulders. 

“Was that Natasha?” he said and moved to wrap his arms around Steve's stomach, kissing his jaw.

“Yea.” he said and kissed the top of his head. “She knows.”

Bucky moved his head from his chest to tilt his head back and look at him. “She does?”

“Yea.” he said with a light laugh. “Most of them do.”

“Did you tell them?”

“No, they could tell.” he said and Bucky scrunched his eyebrows together. “Apparently we look at each other like we’re lovesick.” he said and ran a hand over his back, listening to the small laugh that erupted from his mouth. “Are you okay with that.”

“Steve, I’d tell the whole world I have you if I could.” he said and leaned back down to lay on his chest, letting himself absorb the contact Steve was giving him. He made sure that he had a hand on him almost all the time when they were together now, just to remind him he wasn’t going anywhere. 

“Me too.” he said and kissed him.


	7. Chapter 7

“Steve we only need you for a few days.” Nat said through the phone. The team was somewhere in Europe working on a mission and for once Steve wasn’t there with the other Avengers. A threat had been called in and he made the decision not to go so that Bucky wouldn’t have to be alone. 

Everyone was fine with it, well, everyone except Bucky, who had insisted that he didn’t need to have a babysitter and that he would leave the building for the three days Steve would be gone. Now Nat was calling him from a mobile phone after a particularly rough fight that they barely got out of. 

“I promise he’ll be okay. Tony said he can make sure he’ll stay in the building if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“It’s not that I just. . .” he looked at Bucky who was sitting on the couch peering up at him in the kitchen from over the top of his book. “I’ll call you back soon.” he said and hung up the phone. He walked over to Buck and sat down next to him, letting his rest on his shoulder. 

“I might have to fly out tonight.” he said in a quiet voice. Moving his head to kiss the pulse point below his ear. 

“Where to?”

“Somewhere in Europe. Nat just called.” 

Bucky just hummed and skimmed his book. “Do you need any help packing?” he asked and grabbed one of Steve’s hands.

“What?”

“Packing. For your trip. Because Natasha just called.” he said, looking at Steve as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. 

“I know, I know. I just. . .You’re okay with it?” he asked, pulling away slightly to watch his face for any doubt. 

“With you doing your job? Steve, I was okay with it in 1943, I am now too.” 

“Really?”

“Really.” he said and kissed the back of his hand. He looked at Bucky again and finally Bucky put down his book and looked at him. “Why would I not be?”

“I don’t know, I just didn’t think you would want to be on your own.”

“Steve, I think I’ll manage.” he said and Steve just nodded and looked down. “Do you want to go?” he asked placed his flesh hand under his chin to move his gaze to interlock with his own. 

“Yes. No? I’m not sure.” he said. “I don’t want to have to leave. Everything has been so nice since we’ve been here.” he said and moved so that he hand an arm wrapped around Buck. He laughed into his shoulder and lifted his head to look at Steve.

“You’re going to have to go eventually.”

“I know.”

“It’s your job, Steve. People depend on you. They need you.” He said and patted his knee encouragingly. 

“I know and that’s why I don’t want to leave.” he said. Bucky nodded as soon as he understood. 

“I’ll be okay on my own you know. I know how to use the phone and the television and somehow there’s always food in the kitchen. I have a lot to catch up on.” he said and kissed his cheek. “If I’m the only thing holding you back then don’t let me stand in your way. I’ll be just fine.” kissing his mouth lightly this time he made sure Steve knew he’d be okay. 

He pulled away and Steve left his mouth pursed in thought. “Only if you’re okay with it.”

“Oh my god, I’ll just pack for you.” Bucky said dramatically and put his booking down, moving to their bedroom. Steve laughed from his place on the couch and stood to follow. He still didn’t feel right about leaving but with Bucky yelling about what underwear he wanted to bring he couldn’t help but smile. 

*

Three days went by quickly but when Steve called and said they were going to be a few days longer, Bucky didn’t miss the tone of disappointment that lingered in his voice. 

Bucky spent time reading and writing, and catching up on movies and TV he had missed watching. There were a lot of good documentaries Steve had lined up, although he tended to skip the war dramas. His therapist came to him every other day just like normal and he got messages from Bruce about new yoga poses he could try.

Tony’s girlfriend Pepper was out of town but lived on the floor above him and Steve, called to see how he was doing several times. She was nice. She told stories about Tony and the other Avengers at parties and dinners and made sure that he was getting food. He talked to JARVIS a lot, asking question during moves about dates and references he didn’t understand and asked about how the others we doing. They were always fine, but tired and dehydrated. He used that fact to have a message sent to Steve to remind him to drink more water. The next day when he asked how they were all doing he realized that he was the only one JARVIS had said had enough fluids. 

On day seven Bucky was reading a book about the evolution of telephones when JARVIS spoke up. 

“Sergeant Barnes, Captain Rogers has just landed on the roof and will be here momentarily.” 

“Thank you JARVIS.” he said and sat up. He moved to the bathroom to make sure he looked alright and then sat down at the dining room table to watch the front door. 

He heard the elevator before he heard the door. It whooshed up the side of the tower and stopped at each floor before finally stopping outside their front door. He heard Steve say goodbye to Tony and step out. He pressed his hand to the ID scanner and the door unlocked. He stepped inside and dropped his bag on the ground and kicked off his boots. Bucky stood and walked quickly to see him. 

“Bucky?” he called out. 

“Hey.” he said as he came around the corner. He immediately moved to hug Steve, pulling him in close and letting him rest his head on his shoulder, pressing lazy kissed on his skin. His head hung heavily and his eyes had circles under them. He looked exhausted but his whole body seemed to relax as he melted into Bucky’s side and kissed his neck from his place. 

“Damn, I missed you Buck.” He said and moved to pull his face in to kiss him. He smiled into it as he felt the tip of Steve’s tongue move across his lower lip and bite before moving to hold his hips. Buck held the sides of his neck and licked his plump top lip, moving in perfect synchrony with Steve. 

“I love you.” he said as he pulled away quickly before diving back in. Bucky smiled and nipped at his bottom lip. 

“I love you too.” he said and kissed the corner of his mouth. “How was the mission? Are you okay?” he asked, looking him up and down to make sure he made it back in on piece. 

“I’m fine. I’m tired but. . . I’m feeling better now.” he said and intertwined his hands with Bucky’s hands. Buck didn’t miss the twinkle in his eye as he spoke and and smiled softly as he ran a finger along the curve of his jaw. He let his head fall back so Steve could have easier access to his neck. 

His lips moved over the skin and stopped to kiss him softly. Bucky moan as his lips moved lower and he couldn’t deny that he felt himself twitch at the sensation. He moved his lips even lower to one especially sensitive point and Bucky moaned, causing Steve to roll his hips into him, brushing their clothed cocks.

Bucky froze at the sensation. “Shit, Buck I’m sorry.” Steve said. “Got a little carried away.”

“No, no. I’m okay.” he said and kissed his neck. “You should do that again.”

Steve smiled and rolled his hips against Buck again, this time harder and slower, making sure that their erections pressed against each other fully. They groaned in each other's mouths and as Steve went to do it again Bucky slid a hand down his chest to his belt. He began opening it and pulling at the button.

“You sure?” Steve asked. “We don’t have to do this.” he said as he realized how fast their make out session had escalated. 

“I want this. Trust me.” he said and kissed Steve’s hipbone as pulled his jeans and boxers to the ground in one fluid motion. 

His dick popped out and bounced up to his his stomach as Bucky eyed it hungrily. He looked up at Steve from his place on the floor with the most innocent eyes Steve had ever seen. He moved to lick the tip, never taking his eyes off of Steve. He groaned at the contact and the his head back. He wrapped his lips around the tip and sucked while his tongue massaged the head. Steve let out a low groan and gasped as he moved his head further down. 

His nose was nearly touching Steve’s stomach on the first try and just the sight of Buck like this made him see stars. He began to bob his head back and forth on his dick and Steve tried to resist the urge to fuck his mouth. He wanted so badly to see his eyes water as he rammed his dick down his throat, but he decided they might save that for another night. 

He heard Bucky take his cock out of his own jeans and begin to stroke it as he sucked Steve off. He was close enough as it was and decided that as warm and wet and heavenly as Bucky’s mouth he did want to finish in it tonight. He pulled back so that his dick pulled out and Bucky was staring up at him with wide eyes. He watched his pink tongue slide across his lips as he eyed Steve as he reached down to pull him. 

He grabbed his hand as he stepped out of jeans and led him to their bedroom where he laid him down and kneeled in front of him. He craned his neck up and brought him in for a kiss, grunting when he tasted his own juices in his mouth. He pulled back when he felt Bucky’s cock twitch against his chest and smiled as he grabbed his jeans to pull them off his body. 

“What do you want, baby?” he asked as he lightly stroked his cock, watching him squirm. 

“Your- fuck, I want your fingers in me. I want you to fuck me.” he said. Steve swore his heart stopped. He had never been more turned on in his life. 

He kissed his hip before holding up two fingers to Bucky;s mouth. He took them greedily, making sure that they were coated in spit so that Steve could fuck him easier. His tongue ran along his knuckles and around his calloused fingertips before he pulled them away. Pressing them to his hole, Bucky sighed and pulled his knees up so that there was easier access to the entrance. 

Steve kissed the back of his lifted thigh as he pushed the two fingers in carefully, letting him take his time to adjust. 

His face scrunched up in pain at first but he relaxed as he lightly stroked his cock and scissored his fingers to open him up. He groaned and rolled his hips against his hand, pressing the fingers in harder, making him moan faster and bit his bottom lip.

“You’re so good to me baby. So tight, so warm.” he said and kissed the side of his neck, moving his fingers in so they were deeper, pressing against his prostate, making him squirm under Steve’s weight. He opened his mouth to groan but the sound was cut short by Steve’s tongue moving to suck his bottom lip. 

He kept pushing his fingers in and out of Buck, curling them at the end of each stroke to open him up so he would be able to take Steve the way he wanted him to. He wanted to watch his eyes roll back in his head and get lost in the pleasure. It was euphoric just at the thought and he didn’t know how much longer he would be able to last without being inside of him. 

He must have been thinking the same thing because he pulled away from Steve’s mouth and groaned. “Steve, please. Please.”

“What do you want, baby?” he asked as he pulled his fingers all the way out. Bucky groaned and rolled his hips, lost without the pleasure. “Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you.” he said and sucked on his jaw.

“Fuck me. Please, Steve, please fuck me.” he said and reached between them to grab his dick and move it to his opening. He grabbed lube out of the nightstand next to his bed and coated his palm with the clear substance as he lined his cock up with the warm hole that was waiting in front of him.

He thrust forward slowly, letting every centimeter of himself be covered by Bucky’s warmth. When he looked down his chest clenched at the sight of them together. It was so impossible that he was with him right then but somehow they were. Buck must have been thinking the same thing because he reached up to grab his neck and pull him in for a kiss. 

Their lips collided as Steve rammed into Bucky, making him moan and hiss as the sensation. He was biting his lip and reaching between them to stroke his cock. 

All Steve could process was Bucky. Bucky was warm and tight and there and he was clenching around him so deliciously that he honestly couldn't see anything other than his face below him, twisting up in pleasure and releasing moans. It was euphoric and he was pretty sure if he died right then he be happy as long as he didn’t have to look away from Bucky’s face and the ewas his cock was leaking onto his stomach. He moaned as Steve thrust in deeper and cried when he ran a hand over his chest, toying with his nipples. 

“Steve. . .I’m going to. . .”

“Come. I got you.” he said and threw his head down to suck on his neck, feeling his own release start to spurt out. Bucky cried out as he came all over his stomach. His eyes rolled back in his head and his neck craned back and gave Steve the perfect opportunity to suck a bruise. He cried as his teeth sunk into his neck and licked a stripe up to his ear.

They both relaxed and sunk down into the mattress. Bucky moaned lightly as Steve pulled out, moving to grab tissues off the nightstand to clean him up. 

“Are you alright.” he said as he threw the dirty tissues into the waste basket and moved to cuddle him to his chest. 

“Yea. . .I’m fine. Are you.”

“Yea.” he said and kissed the top his his head. “I love you.” he said against his temple. Placing a lush kiss to the soft skin he felt Bucky smile and nuzzle against his chest. 

“Love you.” he said as his eyelids started to drift shut. He tried to keep them open and Steve vaguely remembered him having the same look on his face after missions when they would came back to base and hold each other close, thankful that they made it out alive once more. 

“Go to sleep. I got you.” he said. Buck nodded against his chest and kissed his collarbone before nodding off. 

Steve watched him for a moment as he felt himself start to daze. His face was peaceful and relaxed as he slept, pressed against Steve’s chest over his heart. He liked the idea that maybe Buck could feel the way it beat when he laid over it. How it would swell and his chest would clench, making him shudder out of sheer amazement of how much he could love him. 

Because he did love him. More than anything.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up; I'm going to start writing this more as a series of connected one-shots rather than a full story with a continuous plot. All characters will be from the MCU and I can promise there will be a lot more sex and love stuff in the future. Enjoy and feel free to leave comments with ideas for future chapters.   
> -Lilly

“Oh come on, I know you got more than that.” Sam taunted from the other side of the ring. He was sparing with Natasha while Steve and Bucky stood on the side watching and wiping sweat off their foreheads. They learned over time that Bucky liked working out to relieve stress, so everyday he and Steve went down three levels to the common floor and used the state of the art gym that Tony had installed. They ran on the treadmills and hit punching bags, and even took turns taking it easy on Sam in the ring. Today though, Natasha got there first was was obviously holding back on Wilson. 

“I’m going to hurt you.” she said and dropped her hands from in front of her face. Sam took the opportunity to charge at her with a warcry that she just rolled her eyes at before tripping him and punching him in the chest so that he was laying flat on his back groaning. Steve and Bucky were laughing from the sideline and she was taking a moment to fix her ponytail. 

“I told you I’d hurt you.” she said and shrugged as he hopped out and moved to one of the treadmills. 

Sam rolled over to groan at Steve and Bucky. “Yea, yea laugh it up.”

“We’ve all had our asses kicked by Nat.” Bucky said as he took a swig of water. 

“I can’t believe he fell for that again.” Steve said and shook his head. 

“Again?” Bucky said with raised eyebrows.

“You have no idea.” Steve said and rolled his eyes. Bucky laughed as he held a hand out for support for Sam. 

"Funny, really funny." He as Buck hoisted him out of the ring. "Like you two haven't had your asses kicked by Ms. Widow before."

"Oh we have."

"We just remembered not to do it again." Bucky added and Steve couldn't help but smile. He was able to hold easy conversations so much easier now and was even able to crack jokes and pick up on sarcasm and use it. Steve just watched in awe as Bucky taunted Sam and made him laugh as they cooled off. He caught his eye after a moment of smiling and smiled softly. Probably thinking the same thing. Steve wiggled his eyebrows and nodded at the elevator that led up to their floor. Bucky nodded and excused himself from his place next to Sam and stood up to take Steve's hand and move to the elevator. 

Steve always admired the way Bucky looked after working out. His hair was usually pulled back into a messy bun he he wore shorts and tanktop. He like the way he could watch his bicep techten through his shoulder every time he hit something, or the way he stuck out his chest as he panted when he ran. Steve never thought of himself as someone who would have kinks, but if he did it was definitely watching Bucky be confident and work out. 

As soon as the doors were closed Steve took his hand and started running his fingers along the waistband of Bucky's shorts. "I'm really proud of you." He said and moved to stand in front of him kiss his jaw. He moved his head back and let it hit the wall of the elevator behind him. "You're so strong, Buck." He said and let his hand rub over his cock over his shorts. He gasped and pushed his hips into Steve's hand. "So beautiful." He said and stroked it slowly. 

"Shit, Steve." He said as the elevator doors opened. He took his hand and moved to the couch and sat him down and straddled him. He moved and ripped of his shirt and traced a hand over his naked upper body, tracing the muscles and stopping to flick his nipples. He moaned underneath him and rolled his hips so that his cock pressed against Steves ass. As much as he wanted to rock back down and ride Bucky until he could see straight, he wanted this to be about him. He was so proud and wanted to remunerate him for everything he had accomplished. 

He slid off of his lap and Bucky lifted his hips so he could pull off his shorts and expose his cock. Steve immediately took it in his hand and began to trace the veins that ran around it with his fingers. Bucky hissed and moaned under his breath and smiled cockily as Steve licked his lips as he eyed the flesh hungrily. 

Steve stuck his tongue out all the way and ran the tip over the flat surface of his tongue. Bucky moaned and he did it again only dropping his head down and swallowing him. Bucky moved to hold his head in his metal hand and stroked his hair so that the small strands were pushed back enough that he could see his entire face. 

Steve looked up at Buck through his lashes and his heart stopped when he saw the look of pure pride and admiration that was washed over his face. Even with his dick in his mouth, Bucky looked so thankful and overwhelmed that it made their moment so much more romantic and intimate. It was always more than just sex. It was a chance at something they didn’t think they would have together ever eagain. 

With renegade strand of hair falling loose from his bun he smiled at Steve and ran his thumb over his cheekbone where it was stretched open to take his cock. His fingerprint felt engraved on Steve’s skin as he pulled away and ran a hand over his forehead, taking care of him as he got him off. It was too lovely. 

Steve hollowed his cheeks to add pressure to the brunet’s cock and he arched his back off the couch as he added to the sensation by rolling his balls in his palm. 

“Fuck, Steve. Mm, yea baby you’re so good, so good to me. Thank you. . .” he said and moaned loudly again as Steve hummed loudly, causing vibrations to run though his leaking cock into the pit of his stomach, where he felt his orgasm begin to rise. “Oh shit.” he groaned and threw his head back as Steve hummed at different levels and sent shivers up his spine as he rolled underneath him on the couch. 

“Steve. . .’m gonna cum.” he hissed and pulled ever so slightly at the roots of his hair. It hurt but Steve liked it and he moaned around Bucky one last time as he began to twitch in his mouth. He began to pull away but Steve didn't want to ruin the moment so he latched onto his hips and sucked, never breaking eye contact with Buck as he came, and when he did he hummed once more and swallowed loudly. 

Bucky groaned loudly as he came and Steve lapped up the dripping semen that leaked out of his cock. He licked his it clean and kissed it before placing light kissed to his hipbone and resting his head on his thigh. 

“You okay?” he asked and looked up at his disheveled boyfriend. 

“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.” he said and smiled. “You’re too good.” he said and brought his hand up to his mouth to kiss. “Thank you.” he said.

“You deserve it.” he said and let each of his fingers be caressed and kissed by Bucky’s mouth.

“Hmm, and why’s that?”

“You’re really hot when you workout.” he said and felt his cheeks flush as Bucky laughed and pulled him up to rest on his lap. “And I’m really proud of you and all the work you’ve done.” he said and interlaced their fingers. 

Bucky nodded and smiled. “You make it easy to want to get better.” he said easily. “It gives me something to work for.” 

“I love you.” Steve said as he nuzzled into his neck and kissed his jaw. 

“I love you too.” he said and kissed the top of his head. Steve didn’t know how long they stayed like that, just sitting naked on the couch but he didn’t care. It was warm and safe and in the afterglow of an orgasm Bucky clung to him beautifully. It was a moment he didn’t ever want to come out of.


	9. Chapter 9

One thing that Bucky had learned about Steve since he had moved in with him in the Avengers tower was that he liked his sleep. He had always been that way, even since they were kids in Brooklyn and he was almost comforted in the fact that he had kept that piece of himself the same. It was normal for him to wake up with Steve’s arms and legs thrown over his body and his head sharing the pillow with his own. He always looked too comfortable and Bucky couldn’t bring himself to make him get up. 

He would get up carefully (when honestly a tank could roll in and Steve wouldn’t so much as flinch), and move to shower and get dressed as the run rose up over New York. He learned through his time with Steve that he would buy him clothes so that his side of the closet was almost as full as Steve’s with everything he would need. When he first moved in it was hard for him to let Steve get him clothes, even though he didn’t have any. The last time he had lived with Steve they didn’t have enough money for food, let alone twelve different hoodies in different colors and fabrics for Bucky to cuddle in. 

He slid on his favorite black hoodie over a t-shirt and a slid on a pair of jeans and his tennis shoes as he pulled his hair up into a bun and moved to the kitchen. 

“Good morning Sergeant Barnes.” JARVIS’ voice rang through the kitchen as soon as he was far enough away that he wouldn’t wake Steve. 

“Good morning, JARVIS.” he said as he started a pot of coffee for Steve. “Where is everyone this morning?” he asked as he flipped the switch and the pot began to drip. 

“I have been told that you and Captain Rogers have been requested on the common floor with the others. They are assembling now.”

“This early? Why? Is everything okay?”

“The situation is secure, it is rather a personal matter.” he spoke. Bucky wondered what could be going on as he grabbed a coffee for 

“Will you let Steve know that I’m heading down.” he asked as he headed for the elevator. “Oh and if he’s not up in ten minutes do you mind waking him up?” he asked as the door binged open. 

“Of course Sergeant Barnes.”

“Thanks JARVIS.” he asked as the doors closed and began pulling him downstairs to the common room. 

When he arrived he saw Bruce, Tony, Pepper, Natasha, Clint, standing around the kitchen island while Sam was working on a pot of coffee. 

“Barnes!” Clint waved him over from his place next to Natasha.

“Where’s Rogers?” she asked. 

“He’s still waking up. He’ll be down in a few minutes.” he said as he took a cup of hot coffee from Tony. 

“I swear that man. . .” Nat said as she rolled her eyes and looked at Clint. “Should we?” she asked.

“Should we what?” said Tony. “Are you two the ones who called us down here?” he asked and looked around.

“I thought it was you.” Bruce spoke up.

“You know for once it wasn’t. I was perfectly happy in bed with this one.” he said and pulled Pepper into his side.

“I can guarantee that once this is over we’ll be back in bed.” she said as he rolled her eyes and patted his head. He hummed and kissed her neck. “Can we please just do this so we can go back to sleep.”

“Steve isn’t here.” Clint said and Nat just rolled her eyes dramatically.

“He’ll get filled in.” she said and looked at him. He raised his eyebrows and she nodded, seeming to understand what the other one was thinking.

“We decided to get married.” she said nonchalantly. “We just wanted to let you all know now, because it happened last night and we are associates and we care about you and want you to be present at the time.”

“A time which has not yet been decided yet.” Clint added.

The was a collective gasp as everyone began to smile and look around at each other.

“Fuck off.” Tony said with a grin. 

“Fuck on.” Clint said and picked up Natasha’s hand from it’s place on his hip. Sure enough there was a small ring on her finger. 

Tony was the first one to yell and move to hug the couple. Bruce and Bucky just looked at each other with goofy smile as they gazed upon their friends as they took turns hugging everyone in the kitchen. Bucky moved to pull a shoulder around Nat and kiss the side of her head. 

“Congratulations Natasha.” he said and she smiled before pulling away and nodding.

“Thanks Barnes.” she said and moved to hug him tightly once more. 

In the midst of all of this happening they missed the elevator opening and a very tired, very confused Steve wasling out. Everyone was hugging and wiping their eyes in the kitchen and he didn’t quite understand what was happening. 

“What did I miss.” he said and everyone laughed and turned to look at him.

“These two are getting married.” Bruce said and pointed at Clint and Natasha. 

Bucky watched as Steve’s face twisted up and his bottom lip trembled. His eyes almost immediately began to water as he held his arms out as he walked over to the couple and engulfed them both in a hug, nearly toppling them both over as they let it happen. 

“I’m so happy.” he said and held them close. Bucky watched with an amused expression as Steve let out a tear and sniffled loudly. Clint and Natasha looked at each other and smiled knowingly, almost as if this was the reaction they had been waiting for. 

Steve was always got emotional whenever transitions happened in someones life. When the war started and their friends started to get drafted most of them got married before they were deployed so Steve and Buck attended several wedding together back in the day. At every single one Steve sat sniffling next to Bucky, tearing up as soon as the music began to play and the wedding party would walk in. He was always the first one hugging the couple in his scrawny little arms after the ceremony, telling them how beautiful they were and how much he loved them, and everytime he would make the couple tear up. It was just him. He loved love.

As he hugged them he turned his head to look at Buck, who was now smiling brightly after watching him get so excited. 

“Buck, they’re getting married.” he said and moved to hug Bucky tightly and let his head drop on his shoulder. 

“I know baby.” he said as he rubbed his back as everyone smiled at his emotional mess of a super soldier boyfriend that was crying on his shoulder. He ran a hand through his hair as everyone began asking questions about what was to come.

They wanted to wait until the summer when everything was a little less hectic and it wasn’t going to be huge, probably just there in the common room with friends. Tony and Pepper were already spewing ideas about food and flowers before they were even done talking. 

Steve and Bucky just hugged each other and watched everyone embrace the moment. They talked and laughed and bothered Natasha and Clint about first dances and vows. It was sudden and sweet and was the most beautiful sight.

Bucky watched them and just let himself think about them being in love and what he and Steve looked like to everyone else. He hoped that they looked like Clint and Nat did right then. That people could see that he loved Steve. Not just by holding his hand, but by they way that he looked at him. He hoped people saw that he was the greatest man in the world and that he was his. He hoped Steve thought the same thing. 

“I love you.” he whispered in his ear. He kissed his ear as he turned his head to smile and kiss his jaw. 

“I love you too.” he said and and looked at him quizzically. Bucky just shrugged and hugged Steve’s back tighter to his chest, wrapping his arms around his stomach and placing a kiss every now and then on the back of his neck as they continued to talk and mingle with their friends.  
Everytime he laughed it vibrated through his body and even though he couldn’t really see his face he could tell when he would roll his eyes at Tony because his head would fall back onto Bucky’s shoulder.

“Let’s go home.” he said after a yawn, turning to grab Bucky’s hand and intertwine their fingers. 

“Okay.” he said and nodded. They said their goodbyes to everyone even though they would probably see each other later on in the day. Steve only pulled his hand out of Bucky’s when he went to hug Natasha and Clint individually, telling them again how happy he was. They just smiled and hugged him back, Natasha kissing his cheek after he whispered something in her ear. She bit her bottom lip almost as if to stop it from trembling and look at Clint who was obviously moved by whatever Steve had told them. 

They waved one last time and got in the elevator. The stood opposite each other, just looking and smiling like fools and biting lips and nervously running hands over the back of their necks. 

“Hey.” Steve said and moved to stand in front of him. 

“Hello.” Buck replied with a huff. He moved so that his left arm was wrapped around his waist and his right was gently rubbing circles on his scalp while he kissed his temple softly. They stayed chest to chest as the elevator opened and they walked back so to the couch that sat in the middle of the living room. 

When Steve had first moved in his had insisted that he didn’t need such huge furniture because he was the only one living there, but after some serious persuasion from Sam and Tony, using the threats of watching football together and Sam spending the night while he was in New York he gave in. Now that Bucky was with him he was glad that he made the decision. It was wide enough on the seats so that both of their large frames could lay next to each other while their legs stretched out across the space. 

They took advantage of as they plopped down and relaxed. Steve was laying limp halfway on top of Bucky, not that he minded, and he was drawing his fingers up and down his spine. Steve let out a sigh after a moment and nuzzled his head against his chest, breathing in the scent. 

“This reminds me of when I used to get sick all the time.” he said with a sort of sad laugh that made Bucky think. He had the faintest memories of a much skinnier Steve laying like this across Bucky’s chest when he was really sick in the winter. He held him close to keep him warm and rubbed his hands up and down his back to keep his mind off the pain that rattled in his lungs. 

“You scared me a few times.” he said and looked down at the blonde head of hair that was nodding on his chest. “I used to think it would help if you had the contact.” he said and paused to laugh. “I think I needed it more than you sometimes.” he said and ran a finger across Steve’s high cheekbone. 

“I’m glad we don’t have to worry anymore, ya know?” he said and shrugged. “I feel like we’ve seen enough hell.”

“Damn right.” Bucky said and brought his hand through his hair once more as he felt his eyelids begin to droop. He was too relaxed. It had been so long since he had just let himself be and rest, but with Steve on top of him he felt protected and safe. Truth is he didn’t think he’d be able to feel like this any other way. 

He felt Steve’s head tilt on his chest. “Go back to sleep, baby.” he said and kissed his chest as he nuzzled against him. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

Bucky just groaned. “Love you.” he mumbled.

Steve chuckled and the vibration ran right through him to his heart that clenched at the sound. “I love you too.” he said and kissed the palm of his hand that was laying up on his chest. 

He felt warm, and he felt love. He felt love for the golden boy that was laying on his chest and for his friends who had found love, and for the fact that he had friends. He understood that there was a very real possibility that he might not have had the chance to have this. But he did. Somehow he did.

And goddamn it , he was not letting it go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are always welcome! Thanks for the read!  
> -Lily


	10. Chapter 10

Bucky woke up from a nap on a Tuesday afternoon to the feeling of a pair of lips making there way across his jaw onto the side of his face and up onto his forehead. He hummed as a hand moved to stroke his cheekbone gently as the lips ghosted down the bridge of his nose onto the space above his upper lip. They teased him and moved to kiss his cheek and even with his eyes closed he could tell they were stretched into a smile as they moved to kiss his ear. 

“Wake up, Buck.” Steve said gently and brushed a stray piece of hair behind his ear. He warily opened his eyes and saw Steve’s tired face staring back at him. His eyes looked like they were hard to hold open and there were dark circles forming above his cheekbones. He looked downright exhausted. 

“What’s up.” he replied, sitting up so that his legs were stretched in front of him on the couch behind Steve’s place on the edge. 

“We fell asleep on the couch a few hours ago and I lost track of time.” he said with a small smile. “They need us downstairs.” 

“For what?” He said as he rubbed a hand over his face as Steve got up to grab a shirt out of the dresser on the wall. Bucky watched his back muscles flexed as he lifted his arms up and slid his arms through the long sleeves. 

“New info from the last mission. They think it might be HYDRA.” he said and sighed. “You mind looking over some of it?”

“No, not at all.” he said and swung his legs over the side of the bed, moving catch a shirt that Steve threw at him. He pulled his arms over his head and over his arms, pulling up the sleeves so that they're bunched around his forearms. He followed Steve out into the hallway and interlaced their fingers as they got into the elevator and headed downstairs. 

The elevator doors opened to the common floor where Bruce, Tony, Clint, and Nat were sitting around a communal table. They all greeted each other as Tony pulled up all the information they were going to be looking at. Bucky took a seat across the table from Steve, next to Tony, so that he could get a better look at the information in the files he had. 

He watched Steve move from where he was greeting Bruce to his seat. He pulled out the chair and winced as he sat down slowly, almost as if he was in pain. He landed in the seat with a loud exhale and ran his hands up and down his thighs as looked over the cover of the file that was in front of him. 

He looked up after a moment at Bucky, who was now sitting on the edge of his seat. He just smiled and waved him off, already guessing what he was thinking. Steve shouldn’t be in pain. He really couldn’t get sick because of the serum and he hasn’t felt pain from anything other than getting hurt in a fight since before the war when his asthma would beat him down until he could barely keep his eyes open. 

Bucky always took care of him then. He would turn the water on as hot as it would go and sit on the counter with little Steve curled up in his lap. He would cry and whimper because of the pain and and beg Buck to make it stop. It was hard for Bucky too after Steve’s mom died. She used to be able to scrape together enough money to buy off-brand medicine for him when it got really bad, but without her being able to help Buck had to take time off work to take care of Steve and without the income there was no way he could afford the medicine he so desperately needed. He made the choice early on that he would rather stay at home and take care of Steve full time then go to work and find him unconscious on his bed because no one was there to help him sit up during an asthma attack. He wouldn’t have been able to live with himself if something like that had happened. 

Those same protective instincts kicked in when he saw Steve struggle to sit down, and the more he watched his face he realized how exhausted he looked. They had time off for the last few days and they hadn’t done anything more than lay in bed and go out to a diner twice for late dinners. He shouldn’t be looking and acting like this. 

“Okay, there was a break in at the lab that we were at last month in Berlin. We think it might be related to HYDRA because the same traces left behind the resembles those left by Barnes when we found him earlier this year.” Nat spoke from her place at the head of the table. Tony swiped his hand and moved all of his information from his tablet in front of him to the screen. 

Video clips began rolling of soldiers moving into warehouses and taking vials out of storage and of Nat extracting the same vials when they were on mission. Bucky realized the tactics and technology that they were using to break in and spoke up when he saw a specific code reader that was stuck to the security system outside the door. 

“I’ve used those. They hold the door open while you’re in and once you're out you active it and it detonates itself so all evidence is gone as soon as the team is.”

“So it’s HYDRA?” Tony asked.

“Unless anyone else has access to that kind of technology.” he said and looked over at Steve who was nodding in agreement. “Yea, I think it is.”

“I’ll notify Fury.” She said and pulled out her phone.

“Hey, what was in those vials they took anyway.” Steve asked as he closed his folder. 

“We’re not entirely sure of that.” she said with a sigh as she finished her text and put down her phone. “The only recovered samples we’ve been able to recover have just been high concentrations of chemicals. Bruce has them now.” 

“The only thing that I’ve found in common with any of them has been high traces of mutated potassium.” he said and shook his head. “I have no idea what it means.” 

“Potassium?” Steve asked, sitting up a little straighter. He looked at Bucky who was obviously thinking the same thing. 

“Yea, medical grade. Why?” he asked. Steve sighed and shook his head, Bucky cursing under his breath. 

“We don’t know exactly what was i the serum they gave us to be this way,” he said and gestured between himself and Bucky. “, but the only thing we do know is that it was stabilized by high levels of potassium.”  he said with a sigh. 

“When we got there we thought it was going to be a weapons lab, but those weren't chemicals for weapons that was the HYDRA serum.” Tony spoke up. “Or at least it could be. All the equipment in that lab could have been used for medical engineering.” he said and looked around. 

“That means whatever is in that lab, whatever you brought back is most likely what they gave me during the war.” Bucky said and looked down at his file. “When I fell the next winter they gave me more and put the arm on. It came in a series of doses for me, rather than an operation.” he said and looked back at Steve who was looking at him intently. “I was in that lab for years. There has to be more than just that.” he said.

“Would you be able to recognize it if you saw it?” Bruce asked. “I have samples here.”

“Most likely, yes.” 

“Why don’t you stay back at the lab here and Barton, Stark, and I will go out and try to retrieve the rest of the vials. We can’t have HYDRA getting their hands on that.” she said and Clint and Tony stood. “Meet on the flight deck in fifteen.” she said and they all stood, moving quickly to their perspective places. 

Bucky watched Steve carefully as he stood, still slowly, but without groaning like he had before. He took his hand as he walked around the side of the table to follow Bruce. 

“Are you okay.”

“I’m fine.” he said and kissed his temple. “Don’t worry, we have bigger things to think about right now.” he said and picked up his folder, following Bruce to the elevator to his floor where his lab was stationed. 

It wasn’t as expensive as Tony’s was but still had the same technology and gadgets but without the glass panels separating rooms and equipment. Bucky didn’t feel like he was going to break anything just by standing near it.

“Okay, so the samples I’ve gathered are just a liquid base of chemicals that can be injected, although that wasn’t by first instinct when I found it.” he said and took a seat in front of a microscope. He grabbed a glass dish off the cabinet above him and opened it carefully. “This is just a protein sample that I’m going to sample the serum on.” he said as Steve and Bucky took seats on the other side of the work station. 

“How will you know if it is?” Bucky asked nervously. 

“Well the protein will engorge and the cells will being to mutate into stronger cells. It’s basically what happened to you.” he said and looked up from his work suddenly. “I’m sorry was that insensitive?” he asked and they just chuckled.

“I’ve heard worse.” Steve replied and craned his neck to watch as he paced a drop of the sample onto the dish and placed it under microscope. 

“This might take a minute, but while you’re down here can I get a blood sample.” he asked Steve and he nodded, holding out his hand as Bruce gabbed a small needle and a test sample strip. “I just want something to came the protein to.” he said as he gabbed the needle into the tip of Steve’s middle finger, pulling it out quickly and placing the test strip on in its place. 

He pulled it away and Buck watched as Steve wiped it across his jeans to stop the bleeding before moving his gaze back to Bruce, who was placing the protein and the blood sample next to each other under microscopes.  
“I’ve heard worse.” Steve replied and craned his neck to watch as he paced a drop of the sample onto the dish and placed it under microscope. 

“This might take a minute, but while you’re down here can I get a blood sample.” he asked Steve and he nodded, holding out his hand as Bruce grabbed a small needle and a test sample strip. “I just want something to compare the protein to.” he said as he gabbed the needle into the tip of Steve’s middle finger, pulling it out quickly and placing the test strip on in its place. 

He pulled it away and Buck watched as Steve wiped it across his jeans to stop the bleeding before moving his gaze back to Bruce, who was placing the protein and the blood sample next to each other under microscopes.He placed the trays into slots on the microscopes and fixed the dials so that he could see clearly. 

“There we go.” he said and took his hands of the dials. “Wait a second. . .” he said and moved the lens so that it was placed over Steve’s blood sample. They looked at each other with worry as Bruce zoomed over the glass tray with a larger scope. 

“Is everything okay?” Bucky asked while Steve just stared at Bruce. 

“I don’t know.” he said and and lifted his head. “What year were you injected?” he asked and took off his glasses to look at Steve more clearly. 

“1943.” 

“What about you?” he asked and look at Buck.

“My first injection was in 1943 but I got them about every three years after that to keep it up. After a while they stopped though. I think it just ended up taking.” Bruce nodded his head and looked back at the microscope without his glasses. 

“Is everything okay?”

“Well, it’s just strange. Steve’s cells look way different than yours do. They have tried to age with him but there is what looks like a protective bond around the cell that prevents that from happening, while your blood samples that I took when you first got here just showed mutated cells. 

“What does that mean?” Steve asked

“It means that over time your body has grown accustomed to the cell pattern and because they were alive for so long they began to age. Your body is essentially trying to reboot but there’s nothing left to help you do that.” he said sadly as he realized what this meant. 

“He needs what I got.” Bucky said.

“Precisely.” he said and looked at Steve who was now leaning his body weight against the counter looking at the sample under microscope. He looked at Bucky and studied his face for a moment. 

“What happens if I don’t take it.”

“Well I don’t know. There’s only two test subjects of the serum and that’s you guys but because Barnes had it in a series of injections it changed his cells as he aged year by year. He had time to adjust and grow into it. By the looks of things it seems that that was the plan for you, Steve, if the doctor that had created had carried out his plan.”

“Erskine died minutes after I was first injected.” he said and looked back at Bucky. “That means when I found you. . .”

“I had already been injected.” he said and sighed. “My body had already been exposed. That must be why I survived the fall.”Steve flinched at the memory and pinched the bridge of his nose. All the information flying at him was not eased by the memory of Bucky’s tired body falling off the side of the train into the snowy valley. He had no idea that it was even a possibility for Bucky to live and be with him today after everything HYDRA did to him. They had ripped him apart and made him a machine. They had tortured him in the most barbaric, horrific ways imaginable and yet somehow he was next to Steve, holding his hand under the table as they got bad news. He wanted nothing to do with HYDRA.

“What if I didn’t take it?” he asked.

“Steve.” Bucky said sternly from his place next to him. 

“What would happen?” he asked Bruce, not even daring to move to meet Bucky’s gaze.

“Your health you begin to decline. Immune system would start to shut down, muscles and bones would go.” he said and looked down at his hands. “Honestly I don’t think you’d make it till the end of the year.“

“But we’d be relying on HYDRA medicine to do it.”

“To do what? To keep you alive?” Bucky asked angrily from his spot, his knee was bouncing wildly and his breath came out in worried huffs, almost as if his chest was clenching the way it did before he cried. “Yes Steve I think that might be worth it.”

“I’m not showing any signs yet Buck, if I wait-”

“Steve you could barely make it to the meeting this morning.” he cut in. “We’ve been sleeping for the last three days, yet for some reason you’re exhausted, I mean.” He squeezed his hand under the table. “Why the hell would you not want to do this. As soon as Nat and the guys get back we’ll start doses,“he said looking at Bruce who nodded his head in confirmation “, and we’ll go from there.” he said and watched his face,

“Yea, but we’ll be relying on HYDRA, Buck. They ruined our lives.” he said and swallowed thickly. Bucky looked at him with a baffled expression.

“I know but this is the only option we have right now. We’re not giving up now Steve not after all the shit we’ve seen.” he said and lowered his voice. “I’m not going to loose you in the same year I got you back.” he said and squeezed his hand again.

“Buck. . .”

“Tell me you want to watch yourself die.” he said and looked back at Bruce. “Because I can guarantee that there is an army of people willing to stop you from doing that.” he said and they locked eyes again. Steve saw fear, real fear in his pleading eyes and he wasn’t sure how much more Buck could take. If Steve died that would be it. He was begging him now and it was all he had not to crawl onto his lap the way he used to when he was young and just let him stroke his hair until he felt better. 

“Okay.” he said and looked down. “As soon as they get back.” he said and looked back at Bruce. “Thank you, for everything.”

“I don’t think I should be thanked for bad news.” he said and nodded his head. “I promise I’ll do everything I can, Cap.” he said and reached his hand out to shake. He shook it weakly and smiled before retracting it and bracing one hand on either side of the chair he was sitting in before lifting himself out, ignoring the burning that seared through his muscles. Bucky must have noticed because he took his arm to make sure he didn’t trip and slid their fingers together so that they could walk back together.

The elevator ride was silent. Bucky had his head tilted back against the wall and Steve was looking down at his feet until the door opened and to their apartment. Their hands stayed connected as they walked in but their arms began to separate as Buck headed for the kitchen while Steve made a move to the couch. He panicked as he felt them separating and used what strength he had left to pull himself against Bucky’s chest. 

Bucky sighed as Steve buried his head in the crook his his neck and kissed his flesh shoulder over his shirt as the other hand moved up his metal arm. “I love you.” he said softly before pressing himself to his body. Buck just sighed again and moved to stroke the back of his head and wrap an arm around his waist.

“You have to take it Steve. I don’t care that it’s HYDRA, I really don’t. Not when we’re safe here and your life depends on it.” he said as he kissed his temple and ran his nose along his hairline, nuzzling the faces together. “I can’t lose you again.”

Steve just wrapped his arms around his waist tightly. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“You better not be.” he said and kissed his forehead. “I only just got you back.” he said quietly and continued to stroke his face with his thumbs. “My beautiful Steve.” he repeated. “I love you so much.” he said as he cradled his head in his hands. Steve nodded so that his hands moved with his head and he could feel him understand how much he loved him. 

“I love you too.” 

 

*

 

It ended up being just over three days that the other half of the gang was gone but in those days Steve’s health had rapidly declined. On Tuesday night when he went to bed he said he was still tired and his muscles felt sore but when they woke up on Wednesday morning he could barely sit up on his own and he had a hard time breathing. Bucky had called Bruce up and he brought an oxygen tank with him that Steve could wear while he laid in bed so he wouldn’t tire himself out. While he was showing Steve how to work the machine he stepped out and called Tony, quickly explaining what was going on and that they needed to be there as soon as possible for Bruce to be able to check the serum and make sure it was safe before giving Steve his first dose. 

They thought it would just be a matter of hours before they would be able to race back and deliver the drug to Steve but when weather complications hit them in the UK on the way back they were grounded for an extra fourteen hours, carrying them into Friday before they could even get back into the US. When they finally arrived Steve and Bucky could hear the blades of the helicopter before anyone was in the building. Bruce was waiting on the roof where Nat threw him a briefcase with the vial in it while it was landing on the launch pad so that he could run in and check it. 

They all gathered on Steve and Bucky’s living room rug, still in uniform, to sit with him while Bruce made sure everything was okay. They all looked between each other warily, making sure that Steve was going to be okay. He looked like death. His metabolism was shot so he hadn’t been able to process any food or water for the last five days so there was an IV in his left arm and his oxygen tubes up his nose. When they first walked in they were startled at his appearance and it made them scared to see their captain that way; all frail, with tubes and wires attached to his body.

“I’ll tell ya, man you better not pull anything like this again.” Tony had said after he had gotten out of his suit and joined them. Bucky heard Steve laugh and start talking on the couch from his place in the kitchen where he making tea for Steve and getting beers for everyone else.

“Hey.” Nat came up behind him and walked around to the other side of the counter and took an open beer and sipped it.

“Hi. How are you.” he asked.

“I’m good. How are you?” she asked with an arched eyebrow. “You look almost as bad as Cap does.”

“That bad huh?” he asked with a small laugh and put down the cap of the bottle he had just opened and grabbed the others with his metal hand and picking up the tea in the other. “I haven’t slept in a few days.” he said and Nat just nodded. 

“Most people would freak and leave if something like this happened. You’re a good man, Barnes. Thank you for taking care of him for us.” she said as they approached the living room where everyone was sitting. 

“I could say the same to you.” he said and nodded his head gratefully. Nat was always nice to Bucky. When he was originally brought in she was the first person who had treated him like a human being since 1943. She asked him questions and gave him food and water all while making sure he was safe and the people around him were calm. He knew she helped Steve along the road and that they were good friends with Sam, but he didn’t know how much they meant to each other until he arrived and saw them interact. “Thank you for always watching out for him.” he said snd she nodded and placed a hand on his metal bicep, brining him in to kiss his cheek. He smiled warmly and followed her back into the living room where Bruce was now sitting next to Steve on the couch. 

Buck hurried in and placed the drinks on the table and sat down next to Steve. His left arm was outstretched in front of him and there was a tray with a large syringe placed on it next to him. Bruce wiped off his arm with an alcohol pad and wiped the skin to make sure it was permeable. 

“Ready?” he asked and Steve just nodded and grabbed Bucky’s hand with his free one. Buck brought them up to his face and kissed his palm before setting them on his lap.

Bruce drove the needle into Steve’s forearm and pushed the plunger down. He winced and squeezed his eyes shut as the fluid was injected.

“God damn it.” he said through his teeth as Bruce pulled the needle out and replaced it with a cotton ball as it started to bleed. 

“I’d say within the next seventy-two hours you should be feeling better. There’s a gentle sedative in it as well so you might start to feel tired soon, so make sure to watch him.” he said, focusing his gaze to Bucky who was nodding and brushing his fingers through the hair on the nape of his neck. 

“Like he ever takes his eyes off of him.” Tony chuckled with a smirk. They all laughed and Steve’s cheeks were tinted the lightest shade of pink as he smiled. 

“I’ll be back in the morning.” Bruce said as he noticed his head start to droop and his eyes become heavy. “Everyone out.” he said and herded their friends out. They all sad their goodbyes and Steve waved back, totally on cloud nine from whatever sedative Bruce had added to the serum. 

Bucky picked him up and carried him to their room, placing the small oxygen tank on his stomach and pulling the IV stand behind them. He laid him down carefully on the bed and kissed his forehead as he giggled and put his tank on the floor.

“Buck.” he said loonily as his head nodded back and forth. 

“What’s up baby.” he said and sat next to him on the edge of the bed. 

“Hmmm, I love you.” he said with a smile. “You’re so beautiful, I love you.” he said reached out to touch his face. 

Buck laughed and kissed his hand. “I love you too, baby. Can you get some sleep for me? You need lots of rest.” he said as Steve nodded and tilted his head back to hit the pillow. Within seconds he was out and small soft snores were slipping out of his parted lips. Bucky just smiled and got into bed next to him

 

*

 

Bucky woke up on a Tuesday morning to Steve shaking him awake.

“Babe, babe, Buck, Bucky, Bucky Barnes, baby. . .” Steve said to Bucky, who was now hiding under his pillow on their bed. Ever since he had been injected with the new serum he had even more energy and a faster metabolism. He was having fun going without stopping and Bucky was right there with him for the whole thing. 

“Yes, Steve.” he said and finally threw the pillow back, revealing Steve straddling him in workout clothes. Not the worst thing to wake up to.

“Let’s go for a run.” he said and hopped off him quickly and held out his hand. Bucky just chuckled and shook his head and held out his hand in return. Steve took it and practically threw him out of bed, moving to pull on his running shoes. Bucky watched him with a small smile. He was energy and he was life. He was the Steve Rogers was always meant to be and if that meant having to get a shot every six months to make sure he would stay that way he was pretty sure he was okay with whatever morning workout he had planned. 

“What?” Steve asked after a moment of noticing Bucky staring. 

“Nothing, I just love you that’s all.”

“I love you too.” he said and smiled for a moment. “Let’s go.” he said and threw him a shirt before running out of the room. Bucky laughed and tugged it on. 

God only knows he would follow that man anywhere.


	11. Chapter 11

Bucky wasn’t nearly as helpless as most people though he was. Steve had noticed that over the last few weeks. Most people thought that because of everything he had been through that the was now a fragile shell of a man that needed constant care and love (which, he did), but not to the extreme extent that it was being thrown at him. He noticed the way he would sigh like he was annoyed every time he would have a psychiatric exam and the doctors would speak in hush voices and ask him if he had been having bad dreams. Steve would just stand in the kitchen and bite his tongue as he though about the million thoughts that must be running through his head and how hard he must have been trying not to roll his eyes. Bucky would just sigh and keep talking about his week like he always did, in a normal volume, and then ask what time they should schedule for the next meeting. 

He knew that Buck did need love and reinforcement that he was loved and needed and that he was human and that he was safe, but he also wanted to be treated like a man. He wanted to be treated like he could take a punch just like everyone else around him and not go spiraling back into the machine that he had once been trained to be. He didn’t want to be triggered but he didn’t want to be treated like he was a fragile doll that had to be worried about and taken care of. 

Bucky hated it when he felt that the people around him where trying the censor themselves to keep him at bay. He knew in his heart of hearts they were doing it because they loved him but damn, there was only so much recovery that he actually wanted to do. 

He noticed it the most when he was with Steve. He worshiped his body like it was a fucking life source and made sure that no part of Bucky went untouched and that they were always taking it slow enough that they could stop if they needed to. It was nice at first just to be with Steve and reconnect with him and to feel his skin pressed against him again. It made him feel safe and he knew that no matter what as long as he was with Steve he would be able to get off but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t miss the days when they had to stay hushed and had to be careful. 

When they were in the war they shared a tent every night and almost every night they would spent at least a half an hour mercilessly pounding into each other until the tent was hot and the only thing they could see was each other. Sure, sometimes they were sore the neck day and more than once Bucky had found a handprint left on his ass from Steve’s palm and Steve would find bite marks on his hands and arms where Bucky had sunk his teeth into flesh to stay quiet but they never complained about it. In fact, they liked it. 

Bucky still liked it; still though abut what it would feel like for Steve to leave marks across his body or for his palm to slap his ass and dig into his hips. He didn’t know how to tell Steve that he wanted to be fucked like he used to be but after much consideration and though he decided that he would rather just show him. 

The next time that they were together it was early in the evening before dinner with Sam and Tony. They had both just gotten out of the shower after the gym when Steve has slowly taken their towels off and slid one hand around to started to jerk him off and the other began to play with his hole. Bucky thrust onto his hand, making the tip of his finger penetrate for a split second. He wasn’t fully prepped yet and he winced slightly at the pain but that quickly turned into a moan.

“Buck. . .” Steve had said from behind him.

“Again. More.” he panted and and thrust into his hand again, purposely making sure that when her moved back his ass rubbed against his hard cock and he moaned. “Please, Steve. Please fuck me.”

He turned to face him, moving a hand down to stroke his cock. He eyes fluttered shut with a groan and he bit his lip in the sexiest, dirtiest way possible when Buck moved to suck on his chest, trying his very best to leave a bruise. “Fuck. . .” he sighed and moved around to grab an handful of Buck’s ass and squeeze and massage it. “You want me to fuck you?” 

“Yes please.” Bucky said and bit his lip and batted his eyelashes, never breaking eye contact with Steve. 

“You really want me to fuck you?” he asked again, his eyes darkening and licking his lips.

“Shit, yes. Please, Steve, fuck me hard baby. Rough me up.” he said and moved his face down to lick over the bruise on his pec. 

“You asked for it.” he said and picked him up in one fluid motion and pinned him against the wall, immediately shoving his cock in his ass. With the little prep time he’d had he gasped at the sudden pressure and sighed as Steve fucked in away. He wrapped his legs around his waist and his arms around his neck with a moan and grunt as he pushed himself in opposition of the wall so that his hips were angled to meet Steve’s with every thrust. 

“Fuck, baby.” he said with a groan and pounded even harder into Buck. He was moaning and panting against Steve’s chest and tried to make himself quiet as he bit down on the vein that was bulging on the side of his neck. “No, no baby. I want to hear you.” he said and Bucky could’ve sworn he could’ve come right then. 

When were alone together during the war they had to stay quiet. They had no choice. Steve was always worse, so bad that Buck would always have to wear sleeves the next day to hide the bite marks and bruises that littered his chest from his mouth. He was always able to contain himself pretty well but with Steve fucking him it was hard not to make noise. Before he moved in with Steve they were never allowed to make noise, but now that they had a place to themselves they could scream if they wanted to and not get in trouble.

Bucky moaned loudly and threw his head back. It hit the wall but in the moment he didn’t care. Steve hummed and he could tell he was enjoying it so he moaned louder and bit his lip, making sure that he could see. Steve only thrust in harder and faster, making both of them pant and sweat against each other. When Steve topped it was all about his body connecting with Bucky’s and making him feel safe even if he was pounding into him relentlessly. Buck never forgot that, especially when he brought a hand around to hold his lower back. 

“Steve. . .” he moaned and threw his head forward. He suddenly moved from their place against the wall and started walking to their bed, all the while still holding Bucky effortlessly before dropping himself down on the bed. Bucky quickly took the hint and rolled his hips so he was riding Steve. 

His hips moved in circles as he clenched around Steve, barely even pulling himself put enough to thrust. He bounced quickly and placed his hands on Steve’s chest to support himself, letting his fingers splay out and trace over the soft flesh. It was pale but flushed with red from his strain and there were several marks he knew would be stained with blue and purple in a few hours. 

Steve reached down and started stroking his cock, making and coherent thoughts fly out of his mind. His thumb ran over his warm flesh before had added more fingers, one by one. Bucky liked being held hard when he was on top of Steve like this and his free hand moved to hold his hip roughly. This digits kneaded into the flesh and pulled at the skin, making it blush red and sting when he massaged it. Bucky didn’t care, he liked it too much. He was so out of his mind he barely registered that Steve’s hand came down and slapped his ass with a hard and fast tap. He gasped and stopped moving his hips as he moaned and sighed at the feeling. 

He reopened his eyes and looked down at Steve whose eyes were dark with lust and his face strained with pleasure. He bit his lip and rolled his hips faster, causing the both of them to groan and hold each others flesh even tighter.   
“Buck. . . I can’t, I’m-”

“Come. Fill me up.” he said as he tried t keep an even pace with his hips. Steve eyes rolled back in his head and he dropped his head down onto the pillow behind him. Bucky saw him twitch and felt him shoot thick hot spurts of come. He let his head fall back as he felt himself spray Steve’s chest with his release. Everything was fuzzy and he didn’t really know which way was up, not that he cared, but Steve’s face was in focus and was lightly stoking his stomach as he came down. 

He let himself fall forward and rest his head in the crook of Steve’s neck. He brought a hand up and brushed pieces of ling hair off his neck and began to kiss every piece of skin he could reach without moving and disrupting his spent lover. Bucky hummed softly and turned his head so that Steve could kiss his lips as they laid there in the afterglow. 

“Are you okay.” he asked softly. Bucky could see that he was immediately filled with sudden panic and guilt at how hard he had taken it with him. He ran a hand over the flesh over his hip that he had squeezed and pulled at and softly drug his fingers over the soft skin.

“I’m fine don’t worry.” he said and kissed him. “Just a little sticky that’s all.” he said as he shifted and felt the drying come on his body.

“So much for showers.” he said as he pulled away and laughed. Bucky smiled and chuckled, feeling the laugh resonate throughout their bodies. 

“We could share one.” he said as Steve laughed. “It’s just a suggestion. We’d be saving water.”

“How noble of you.”

“I take nobility very seriously.”

“I’m sure you do.” he said with another laugh.

“No really, I’m a strong believer in nobility and justice. That’s why I sleep with Captain America.” he said and Steve just laughed harder, shaking them both. “It’s incredibly patriotic of me. God bless-” Steve cut him off with a kiss as they headed to the bathroom so shower together. To save water.


	12. Chapter 12

Steve let his head fall back with a groan as he let the hot water that was pounding out of the shower head soak him. He moaned as he felt his muscles relax and cleanse under the scalding spray. He leaned against the wall next to him and just stood there, letting himself decompress. Work was finally over for the week and although he had a million things to do over his weekend he couldn’t think through at the moment and he wasn’t sure anything could make that moment any better. 

Except for one thing. . .

He heard him come in through the bathroom door quietly through the steam and lightly shut it behind him. Steve stuck his head through the curtain and smiled as Bucky leaned against the sink. 

“Are you just gonna look or are you going to get in here and keep me company.” he said with a cocked eyebrow. Bucky just laughed and shook his head as he shed his shirt onto the bathroom floor. Steve closed the curtain and stuck his head back under the spray and soaked his hair, letting his hair fall down onto his forehead. 

Bucky came in a moment later and closed the curtain behind him. Steve turned and faced him with a smile, moving to wrap his arms around his neck and kiss him. He pressed back and moaned as he tilted his head and opened his mouth to suck on Steve’s pink lower lip. He let his hands tangle in his hair and he moved to rub his fingers over his scalp. Steve moaned. Buck knew that he loved to have his hair played with and having his fingernails scrape lightly through the golden strands after a long day. He massaged his temples and slid his hands down to the nape of his neck and began to rub the base with his thumbs. 

Steve pulled away and let his head fall so that his forehead was resting against his shoulder and Bucky could slide his hands down over his scapulas and massage. Steve openly moaned and mouthed at the wet skin on Bucky’s shoulder, while Buck continued to rub his hands over his back. His left hand stayed press under a knot in his back and moved it in slow circles to relieve the tension while his right trailed along his ribcage, making goosebumps arise in their wake. 

Steve felt his hand move so that it was running over his left side and brushing over his ribs. He let himself relax but was suddenly drawn out of his daze when he noticed that Buck was playing with a scarred piece of tissue on his ribcage. He pulled back and looked at what he was dawning on. 

It was the bullet scar from the hellicarrier. The one that Buck. . .

“Bucky, hey.” he said and tilted his head up to look at him. He pressed his lips to his cheek. “Don’t.” he said and moved his head. 

“I know I just. . .” he stopped and looked at Steve. His eyes were tired and worn out. Steve could tell just by looking at him that he was exhausted from thinking about something, most likely why his hands were sliding over the patch or misshapen flesh. “It was today.” he said. Steve nodded as he understood, the events of that day playing out in his mind. 

“How long ago now?”

“Don’t pretend like you don’t know.” he said with a small laugh, but there was no smile. Steve sighed and dropped his head. He watched his hands slide over his chest, where the pale skin was tattered with scars and nicks and bruises, the biggest one from that day over the river. The day that SHEILD went down. He would’ve have gone down too if it weren't for Bucky pulling him out of the water. He still remembers being found by Nat and the rescue crew. He remembers opening his eyes and his heart beating fast because maybe, just maybe he would be there when he turned his head and sat up. As they put him on the stretcher to lift him off the bank of the river he looked and he looked, called out his named and cried when he wasn’t there. Sam had his hand on his chest to help calm him down and Natasha stroked his wet hair, both not knowing what to do. He was emotional, and hurt, and disoriented. He wasn’t sure if it had really happened or not, but when he woke up in the hospital and saw Sam sitting next to him. . . 

He knew it had. 

“That was the best day of my life.” he said quietly. Bucky’s head moved up and looked at him. 

“How was. . .” His eyebrows pinched together and he looked at Steve as if he had told a horrible joke. 

“I knew you were the reason I was still alive.”

“You ever think I was the reason you were barely alive in the first place?” he asked and looked at Steve. “You shouldn’t have come after me, Steve. I almost killed you.”

“But you didn’t.”

“But I could have.”

“But you didn’t. You saved me, Buck.” he said and swallowed the lump in his throat. “When I woke up I had a reason to live again. Before I knew you were still out there I didn’t care if I didn’t make it back on missions. I told myself it was just part of the job, when really. . .” he looked off as he sighed and tried to swallow the emotions that were eating him alive. “I didn’t care if I made it back or not because I didn’t have anyone.”

“You had people, Steve.” Buck said and ran a finger over his cheekbone. The water still ran over the both of them and the steam clouded the shower and shone in the little bit of light coming in through the bathroom window. 

“But, I didn’t have you.” he said quietly. “Nothing mattered without you.” he said and looked at him in the eyes. Bucky opened his mouth to say something but no words came out, he just looked at Steve. 

“You wouldn’t have cared.” he said and looked at him, almost as if he didn’t believe it. 

“And I wouldn’t have started caring if it weren't for you.” he said and skimmed his nose up the side of his jaw, kissing his temple as he stopped. “You gave me a reason to want to come home.”

“You can’t hurt yourself, Stevie. You can’t do that to me. Even if I wasn’t. . . If I didn’t. . .” he just shook his head. “You can’t.”

“I didn’t have anyone around to tell me not to.” he said and kissed his head again. He knew he had friends an colleagues that cared about him but it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t the same as having Bucky around. When he was around he knew that he was loved the same way he loved him. It was raw and passionate and it made him feel alive. 

“I. . .” Bucky didn’t know what to say as he pulled his head back to get a better look at Steve’s face. Both of their eyes were red and he was looking at Bucky like he was the fucking sun. He swore if he looked long enough he could see stars in his eyes. The constellations of dew around his eyelashes made his eyes appear larger and made his face seem boyish and young, just like it had been before the war. Before they had seen death and felt more pain than they could stand. All they had was each other. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Steve said. His eyes looked back at Bucky with nothing but honesty and love. Real, true love. There was no resentment, only forgiveness. 

Bucky couldn’t take it anymore. He leaned forward and kissed him. Wrapping a hand around the back of his neck he moaned and kissed Steve with everything he had. Steve wrapped his arms around his neck while he licked and sucked at his bottom lip, making it swollen and pink, just the way he liked it. Bucky leaned him against the wall of the shower so he was still under the warm spray and just kept kissing him. He didn’t need sex, not at the moment at lest, he just needed to feel him. To have his body pressed against his own. Steve moaned as Bucky lightly bit his bottom lip and he shivered at the sound. He loved that he was able to make him do that. It was euphoric; to know that he made him feel the same way he felt, to feel so alive, so complete, so human. 

Steve pulled away after a few more moments of lazy wet kisses when the water started to run cold and he felt himself subconsciously moving further and further into the corner of the shoer to escape the spray. He kissed him one more time before moving around him and shutting the water off. He pulled back the curtain and stepped out, quickly drying himself and wrapped a towel around his waist. Bucky started to get out but Steve stopped him and took his hand, helping him out. He took another towel off the rack and wrapped it around his shoulders, lightly patting him dry and pressing kisses to his skin. Bucky smiled as he wrapped it around his waist. 

“Thank you.”

“Mmm, my pleasure.” he said as he sucked on his neck. He stood and winked before heading out into their bedroom where they quickly exchanged their towels for sweatpants. Bucky laughed as he looked over to see Steve yawned as he pulled up a pair of Captain America boxers over his ass. 

“What?” he asked with as smile as Bucky flopped onto his side of the bed. 

“You’re the best, that’s all.” he said with a smile as he pulled his hair up and Steve crawled under the covers next to him. He laid his head down on the pillow and closed his eyes, already falling asleep as Bucky turned the lights off. He laid down next to him, facing him on the pillow and kissing his forehead lightly. 

“I love you.” he said and peeked up at him with one eye.

“I love you too baby.” he said and pulled the blankets up around his shoulders. “Go to sleep.”

“I can do that.” he said through a yawn, eyes already closed. Bucky watched as his breathing regulated as his lips parted. It was calming to watch him sleep next to him, knowing that he was safe. He was always safe with Bucky. It hadn’t always been that way but now and forever more, he was his. And he was safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short-ish chapter this time. I wanted to go a little bit into Steve talking to Buck about missing him. Hope you enjoy!


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Bucky watch old interviews of Peggy on her birthday

“Steve?” Bucky called from the front door. Steve looked up from the film he was watching on his computer and smiled. 

“In here.” he hollered back from the dining room. He sat in jeans and white shirt just like any other day only today his eyes were a little more tired than usual and his smile didn’t quite shine as bright. 

“Hey baby.” Bucky said as he came around the corner. He smiled warmly at Steve, who just held out his arms. Bucky frowned and moved to hug him, letting him press his cheek on his torso while he massaged his scalp. “How ya doing?” he asked quietly.

“I’m okay.” he said with a sigh. “It’s her birthday.” he said and Bucky felt his cheek turn up into a small smile.

“I know.” he said and moved to sit in his lap so that he could lean his head in the crook of his neck and stroke his arms reassuringly. Bucky had checked his calendar last night before going to bed and noticed that there was a birthday sticker pasted to the next day. It was for Peggy. 

He knew Steve would have a hard time with it, with knowing that she didn’t have much time left, and that he couldn’t be old with her. He knew that if he could he would take away her pain and take her out dancing, just like he promised he would. 

“Did you go see her?”

“No. Her family is with her today, and if I showed up. . .I, I think it’d be too much.” he said with a small smile and nod. Bucky just nodded along with him. He remembered when he first remembered Peggy he had tentatively asked Steve if she was still alive. He had smiled sadly and nodded, just like he was now, explaining that her mind wasn’t as good as it used to be. That every time he went to visit it was like he defrosted all over again. It was reunion after reunion and it was exhausting for Steve and Peggy, both. He had brought Bucky once, the last time. He remembers watching Peggy’s eyes light up and tear spilling over as Steve dropped to his knees by her bedside and held her hands as she cried. She didn’t notice the flowers that were still fresh from the last time he had come or the picture of them on her nightstand, she only saw the man stuck out of time teary eyed and small on one knee next to her bed. 

She had cried when she saw Bucky, hugging him and kissing his cheek, paying no mind to the metal arm or the fact he and Steve held hands as they sat down next to her. She only nodded saying that ‘if two people deserved love it was them’. They had taken that as a blessing and a gift to hold on to; not knowing if they would be able to hear her say it again. 

“What are you watching?” Bucky said, pressing his nose against Steve’s temple.

“Oh, just some videos from the Smithsonian interviews.” he said and brought black screen to life. A much younger picture of Peggy appeared. Her dark hair was in short curls and her blue dress stood out against the white walls of her home, where she was being filmed. “You want to watch?” he asked.

“Of course I do.” he said and threw and arm around Steve’s neck as he hit the space bar. Immediately her voice poured out of the speakers; warm and familiar. 

“I just remember him being so small. His arms looked like they would break in half if he sneezed too hard. Bloody hell, that man. I remember once in basic training when it was getting closer and closer to picking the solider for the serum experiment and we were giving tests for everyone and one of the commanding officers, Colonial Phillips, threw a bum grenade into the group. All the soldiers flew out of the way, finding behind cars and tanks, but Steve, skinny little Steve jumped right onto of it. He curled up in and and yelled at everyone ‘get back, get back’ but as soon as he realized it wasn’t going off he looked up at us and just asked ‘is this a test?’. That’s when we chose Steve. He wasn’t the biggest or the strongest man, but he was the best. He was the kindest and the bravest. He was always Captain America.” 

Steve smiled sadly at the video, letting himself relax against Bucky and listen to her voice. 

“He had to go on the god awful press tour around the States for, oh boy, what were they? War bonds? I was out in the field with Phillips so I didn’t see him often but our paths crossed again in Italy. I was there meeting the troop and checking in with medical staff to make sure everyone was taken care of and he was there for the troops.” she paused to laugh. “They didn’t think he was great as the girls in New York did. They booed him and threw fruit at the poor soul, and god I remember he was miserable. He came back to headquarters with me for a drink when he overheard Colonial Phillips talking about the 107th. That of course, as you know was the brigade that his best friend, James, Bucky Barnes was in. Phillips was writing letters of condolences to the families of the men when Steve overheard. He wanted to find them and he was told to stand down but, I mean ‘no’ wasn’t really in his vocabulary.” she said and stopped to laugh to herself again, her cherry red lips parting over her while teeth with a giggle. “That’s when he needed the help of not only myself but Howard Stark. We flew him over the HYDRA site, and he jumped out. We had no idea what was going to happen next. We were being shot at on the way back in and he was alone so we had no other option but to go back and wait.”

“We waited for two days, not knowing whether or not he had made it out but on the evening of the third day, you know who waltzed back into camp? Steve Rogers. Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes walked back in like taking down a HYDRA site was a piece of cake. The Howling Commandos rolled in behind them on HYDRA tanks and cars like it was no big deal.” she said and rolled her eyes, as if she was somehow still scolding Steve for not calling her to be picked. Steve just chuckled from his place under Bucky and smiled.

“I think I always knew he was Captain America. That the people that loved him and cherished him always knew he was more that what he had been given in life. That he was better than what he had been served. He was a stubborn ass that man was, but he was wonderful. He cared more about this earth and the people one it than God himself and he never gave up on being good.” she said as her smile faltered slightly. “He was a great man.” she said. 

Her mouth opened to say more but Steve paused it, reaching out to tap the space bar. He brought his hand back to his eyes to wipe the tear that had slipped out of the corner of his eye. Bucky swallowed the lump in his throat and hugged himself tightly around his neck, letting him know that he was there. 

“She loves you.” Steve said as he kissed Buck’s ear lightly. “She always has and she always will.”

“She’s part of us, Steve.” he said and kissed him lightly. “She’ll never really be gone.” he said and kissed his forehead. It hurt him to know that Peggy probably didn’t have much time left and that there was a pretty good chance that this could be her last birthday. 

“I know. She’s too good to be gone.” he said and kissed him again. “I’m glad that we got her blessing. I know she probably doesn’t remember it but that was her. For a minute we had her back and she knew.” he said quietly. “I’d like to think that if we get anything in reward its that. That’s all I wanted.”

“I love you, Steve.” was all he could say as he swallowed the lump in his throat and kissed him again, knowing that Peggy loved them and that they had someone who knew them, really knew them that loved what they had and wanted it to thrive just as much as they did; not only for them but as a gentle “fuck you” to everything that had kept them apart. They were broken and shattered and put back together and they knew that their love was timeless and that time was something that they couldn’t play with anymore than they already had. They knew, they all knew, that they were in it until the end of the line and that one day they would be old and frail like Peggy was now, and they wouldn’t remember what day it was or where they were but they would have each other. The would be able to look into each other’s eyes and know that they were in love. 

“I love you, Bucky.”


	14. Chapter 14

“Steven Grant Rogers!” Steve jumped from his place on the couch as Bucky stormed in the front door, angrily shutting it behind him. “Why the hell did you think it was a good idea to jump out of an elevator?” he said and as Steve stood. He came right up to him, still sweaty from his workout with Sam and hit his chest. 

“What the hell are you talking about?” he asked, suddenly confused why Bucky was so angry. 

“When HYDRA first tried to get you within SHEILD, they cornered you in an elevator and you jumped.” he said and threw his arms out to the side as he made his way into the kitchen. “I was talking to Sam, he told me that there was an entire file just of videos of you doing dumb shit. They have it on record because each time you’d do something they didn’t know if you were going to make it back and that wanted footage for damage control.” he said and slammed the refrigerator door and ripped the cap off a water bottle. “I swear to god, Steven, I’m gone for a few years and all of the sudden you think it’s okay to just jump out of windows. Jesus Christ your mother would kill me.” he said and took a long swig, swallowing half of the bottle before slamming it back down on the counter. 

“Why did you look through all of it?” he asked as he placed his palms flat on the counter, leaning onto it across from Bucky, who was doing the same. 

“I wanted to catch up on everything. What’s new?“ he said, as he took another drink of water. Steve could tell that one had hurt him a bit and he drank slower before throwing the bottle away and looking at Steve. “I wanted to see you fight, just to make sure you were okay.” he said and shook his head. “I had no idea you were being so stupid.”

“Bucky, wait. Come here.” he said as he started to walk towards their bedroom. He turned on his heel and looked at Steve.

“What?”   
“I’m sorry.” he said and walked towards him slowly, knowing he was upset and angry at him. “I’m sorry I jumped on the grenade in ’42, and I’m sorry I thought it was a good idea to jump out of an elevator from the top floor. It was stupid and I didn’t think about who I was putting in danger.” he said as he got close enough to Buck that he could reach out and pull him into a hug. 

“You mean yourself?” he asked and pressed his cheek against his shoulders, letting Steve rub his back. 

“Yea, and you.” he said with a nod, but Bucky just huffed.

“Because I know you think of me but I wanted you to start thinking about yourself.” he said and leaned back to look at his face seriously. “You better not make me loose you again.” he said and kissed his forehead, running his metal hand over Steve’s scalp, calming him.

“I’m not going anywhere.” he said sternly.

“Then stop jumping off buildings. Sam might not get you next time.” he said and ran a thumb over his cheek. 

“I promise I won’t jump off any buildings unless it’s absolutely necessary and that I’ll start wearing parachutes.” he added. Bucky looked at him with wide eyes and dropped his arms. 

“Were you not wearing parachutes?” he gasped.

“Was that not in the file?” he asked through a small forgiving smile. 

“You are unbelievable.” Bucky said and rolled his eyes with a huff, walking down the hall. 

“Aw, Buck, come on babe.” he groaned. “Where are you going?”

“I’m taking a shower and then I’m going downstairs to get some work with Natasha.” he hollered back. 

“Can I come.” he asked. He knew he was pushing his luck but showers with Bucky were. . .sensational. Watching his wet body move with Steve had him hard just at the thought. 

“If you think you’re getting any tonight you are one sorry son of a bitch, Rogers.” he said as he peeked his head around the corner and threw his pants at Steve. 

“I deserved that, didn’t I?” 

“You’re damn right.”

*

“Bucky now!” he yelled. Bucky nodded before coming around the corner, taking out a slew of HYRDA agents that were climbing up the side of the hellicarrier next to them. He covered his back while Sam flew below, making sure everything was under control. 

“Cap, we got three more coming up the back.” Hill said in his earpiece as he watched Bucky take out the last agent. He turned and saw more coming in and he watched Bucky as he heard the same thing in his ear, turn and start shooting. 

“We could jump and let Hill take the carrier out.” he said as he shot alongside Bucky, the agents were getting closer and closer but he wasn’t giving up as he made the last one drop down. 

“What part of stop jumping off of planes do you not understand!” He yelled as he took out another troop of agents. 

“Bucky, this time we don’t have a choice. If we jump, Hill can take it out and we’ll be done.” he said as he flipped another agent over his shoulder. 

“Why am I surprised that this is the best option you could think of?”

“Can you think of a better idea?” he yelled as a moment of silence came over the carrier. “What else do we do?”

“I don't know, but not that Steve.” he said. Steve dropped his arms down in defeat, about to go on about how mad he was at Steve, when suddenly more agents flew in the back of the vessel behind Bucky. He turned to fight but it was too soon, Bucky was pushed back towards Steve as the whole carried tipped in the air. His head hit one of the metal beams on the roof and he was out. His limp body fell into Steve’s arms and when he had a moment to look down Steve saw a bloody gash and a bruise on his forehead. 

“God damn it.” he said as he looked down upon his unconscious boyfriend. 

“Cap, jump. I got you.” Sam yelled in his earpiece as he flew below. Steve pulled Bucky so that he was wrapped tightly around his body and latched onto him for dear life when he took a running start and leapt from the open doors. It was a long jump, from just below the clouds and he had time to look for Sam as he fell. 

Bucky stirred against his chest and moaned in pain as Steve held onto him tighter. He was bleeding all over Steve and there were pieces of flesh shredded on his forehead from the ugly cut the steel beam had made. He knew he would need stitches and that he would have a wicked migraine when he woke up, which might derail him from yelling at Steve. 

He saw the ground come into view, faster and faster and had a momentary thought of ‘what if Same doesn’t come this time?’ but that was quickly shaken out of his mind as he was suddenly jerked upward by Sam. He latched onto the shield that was strapped to his back and brought him down with him, leaning this way and that, taking them back down to the ground on the tower where there was already a med staff on deck. Steve’s feet touched down and he grunted as the full weight of Bucky fell on him. 

He was taken in on a stretcher and wheeled down to their floor by Banner himself. Steve followed, watching worriedly as he groaned when Bruce tried to clean the tattered flesh. It was normal for him to come down and stitch up the men but they didn’t often pass out so he was worried when Bucky could only wheeze in discomfort and had a hard time keeping his eyes open. 

“Is he going to be okay?” Steve asked as they finally made it to their floor and were alone. Bruce had wrapped his stitch up 

“He should be fine. Might have a concussion, so make sure to do all the usual for that. He’ll have a killer headache when he comes to, so have some pain killers ready and also son;t be afraid if he kicks you ass for jumping out of a plane again.” he added with a smirk. Steve just rolled his eyes as he showed him out and held the door open. 

“How did you know about that?”

“Everyone can hear everything on mission and your couple’s brawls tend to keep us entertained when things get boring on the ground he said and shrugged his shoulders. 

“Goodbye, thank you Bruce.”

“He does have a point you know?”

“Goodbye Bruce.”

“You shouldn’t be putting yourself in sketchy situations at you age, well not like age is a factor-”

“Thank you Bruce.” Steve cut him off. “I got it from here.” he said with a smile and a wink as he shook his hand and showed him out the door. He quickly made his way back to the bedroom where was Bucky was still laying, passed out in bed. Steve quickly changed out of uniform and pulled a chair up to his side of the bed so he could watch him until he woke up. 

Bucky was still in uniform but Steve didn’t want to disturb him when he was in so much pain. His brows were in a grimace, even in his sleep and Steve couldn’t help but remember when he would watch him sleep during the war. 

Before the war he would sleep in till noon as much as he could. When he didn’t have to be at the docks at the crack of dawn he would sleep in and cuddle in the covers until only the tips of his hair were sticking out. He would moan and groan when the sun was finally too bright and there was too much noise coming from the streets below, cursing at the cabs for beeping and screeching their tires. His head would pop out and he would look at Steve, who was usually cleaning and doing work around the apartment before he would go to work in the evening. He sit up and rub his face and roll his eyes when Steve would give him a cheesy ‘good morning sunshine’. He never admitted that he really loved it. 

During the war it was a different story. After he’d been reduced by Steve he couldn’t sleep alone. He and Steve would sleep in the same tent and said that they were working late a night when in reality they were pressed against each other in the same sleeping bag on their cot. Bucky was smaller than Steve by about six inches back then and he was the perfect size for Steve to wrap his arms around and tuck his head in under his chin. Before a dank could roll down the road and he wouldn’t so much as stir but then, if Steve even sighed the wrong way he was awake and tugging him close. Making sure that he was safe. It was instinctual and made Steve cry at the look on his face whenever he did. 

Now he slept still, in a deep, hard sleep that left him feeling rested and healthy. He was able to sleep as long as he wanted for the first time in his life and he was able to take advantage of the large bed that Steve had hardly ever used without him. He smiled when he woke up and let himself stretch and roll around in the sheets with Steve before he got up and started the day. It was relaxing and comfortable and they relished the fact that it was their life now and they were able to make their own decisions. 

Now, watching him lay in bed, with a bandaged head and a swollen forehead he realized that this was it. This life that they had made for themselves was the only safe place they had. They were each other's forever, Steve knew that, but the safety that came with that was disrupted every time he did something stupid. Steve always saw it as the right thing to do but Bucky just saw him trying to get back to a state where they didn’t have the security of a home to come back to, or the fact that they could stay in one place without having to worry about being hunted. 

It was like throwing a rock in a still lake. And he was the fucking rock. 

He leaned back in his chair and rubbed his face. He groaned and scratched the top of his head and leaned forward to rest his head on the bed next to Bucky, kissing the top of his hand and holding it in his own. He felt guilty. Really guilty. The kind of guilt that was making his stomach hurt and his hands shake. 

“Hey.” he head a soft voice say.

“Bucky.” he said and shot up so that he was sitting on the edge of the chair. His eyes were half open and he was chewing on his bottom lip. “How do you feel, baby?” he asked as he ran a hand along his arm.

“My head hurts.” he said and moved a hand up to touch the bandages over his forehead. 

“No, no. Don’t touch.” he said and gently grabbed his hand away from his face. “Do you want to change?” he asked and got a small nod in response. “Okay, give me your hand.” he said and took his hand while his other arm hooked around his upper body so he could lift him to sit up on the edge of the bed. He began unbuckling his top gear and unstrapping all of the belts from around his waist. He was careful not to bump his head when he slid his bulletproof vest over his head and let him hold onto his shoulders while he kicked his boots and pants off. He stepped into a pair of Steve’s pajama bottoms and laid back down in bed, exhausted. Steve tucked the covers back over his upper body and handed him two of the pills that Bruce had left along with some water. 

“You gave me a real scare, there Buck.” he said and ran a hand over his forehead soothingly. He nodded as he swallowed the pills and leaned into Steve’s hand. 

“Stupid fuckin’ HYDRA.” he said and groaned as the bandages tugged across this skin. There was a moment of silence between them and Steve sat with his mouth open, hoping the right words would somehow fall out. He couldn’t tell if Bucky knew that they had jumped or if he had been completely unconscious. 

Bucky looked over at Steve, raising one eyebrow. “I know you jumped.” he said and Steve let out a long sigh. 

“Bucky I wouldn’t have done it-”

“If it wasn’t it necessary. I know.” he said and turned his head on the pillow to look at Steve. “I’m not mad.”

“Wha- why-”

“It was necessary.” he groaned and shifted so he was deeper in the covers. “Plus, I can tell you feel bad enough about it that you won’t even think about doing it again unless you’re thrown off the landing deck first.” he winked at Steve, who was still sitting wiht his mouth halfway open on the side of the bad.

“I love you, you know that right.” he was finally able to say.

“Yea, yea I do.” he said and twisted his hand so their fingers were interlocked. “But, Steve?”

“Yea baby.”

“I think I’d fell better if-”

“On it.” Steve cut him off with a smile. He got up and moved to the other side of the bed, laying down next to Buck. He lifted one arm up and Bucky scooted over with a groan until his head was laying on his chest. 

“Thank you.” he said as he draped an arm over Steve’s chest and sighed.

“Anytime.” Steve said with a smile, but Bucky was already passed out. His eyes were closed and his lips were slightly open, letting little yawns out of his mouth. Steve didn’t care that he was heavy against his chest or that he was drooling on his sweatshirt, or that the dried blood from his head were flaking off onto covers below them. All that he cared about was that he was safe, and that wen he woke up he’d take the bandages off and thank the serum for healing his boyfriend so fast. All he cared about was Bucky. And for right now, and forever, that was perfect.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters in one day?! Well done, me.  
> Enjoy!

“James Buchanan Barnes.” Steve said in a sly voice as he leaned against the bar in Tony’s home. There were people buzzing about, celebrating the latest Stark Expo, and for the first time in eighty years he and Bucky were going again. Bucky had been on a small mission with Clint all day so Steve had gotten ready first, pulling on his suit and tie in their home before making his way downstairs to greet everyone and entertain some guests by working with the staff for a few moments behind the bar. He shook martinis and slid beers down to Natasha who grabbed them and tried to make everyone feel at home while they awaited the other Avengers. 

He got a notification on his phone a minute and a half before Bucky came in, smiling at everyone and waving as he made his way down the stairs with Sam and Clint. Steve moved from around the bar and gaped at his boyfriend. He hadn’t seen Bucky in anything dressier than flannel since 1943 and the grey suit he was wearing down made his heart stop and his own suit a little too tight in the crotch. It was a well fitted grey suit with a blue tie that did really incredible things to his eyes. He was freshly shaved and showered and Steve had to resist the urge to lick his face right there on the bar.

Steve leaned against the bar and watched as Bucky winked and made his way over. “Can I help you Mr. Rogers.”

“You look hot as hell.” he said his his ear. “Can’t wait to see this on the floor when we get home.” he said and nipped his earlobe before kissing it and pulling away with a smile, looking like nothing happened. 

“What can I say? Sam has better taste than I do.” he said and tugged at the lapel of his jacket before running a hand over Steve’s tie, straightening it out. “You to look half bad yourself.” he said and kissed his cheek quickly.

“Well, you can’t always wear stars and stripes.” he said and winked as he grabbed his hand, kissing the back of it before making his way to the crowd of people, saying hello to his friends and helping to hand out glasses of champagne. He quickly lost Bucky as he greeted Natasha before making his way over to where Thor was on the couch, telling stories to the WWII vets that had become regulars at the Stark parties. 

Steve watched with a smile as he leaned back with a beer next to Thor and smiled and laughed easily at their conversation. He looked so radiant, so healthy, so alive Steve just sighed as he watched him from his place across the room. 

“Cap, I think you might need to pick your jaw up off the floor.” Natasha said from behind him. She was wearing a form fitting black cocktail dress and her hair was done up to show off her neck and shoulders. “I knew Barnes would clean up good, but not that good.” he said as she sipped her drink. 

“I could say the same thing to you.” Steve said as he looked her up and down. “Not bad Romanoff.”

“I don’t really think I’m your type.” She said and looked back at Bucky, who was still looking devilishly handsome, even sitting next to the god body of Thor.

“Oh trust me you would be.” he said with a small laugh, still looking at her from the corner of his eye. 

“If it weren't for the old ball and chain right?” she laughed. 

“Well,” he said and looked back to where Bucky was sitting. “Let’s just say I don’t mind being tied up.” As soon as the words left his mouth he regretted it. Natasha pulled her drink away from her mouth with a shit-eating grin.

“Really? Rogers likes being tied up?”

“No, no I don’t Natasha.”

“What, no chains and whips, or is that to vanilla for Captain America?”

“I’m never opening my mouth around you ever again.”

“No, no you just save that for Barnes don’t you.” she said with a wink, loving the fact the she was able to get Steve’s tongue twisted. 

“You’re the worst.” he said and grabbed a beer. 

“You love me.” she said as he started walking away.

“Only in that dress.” he said with a wink. She just rolled her eyes as she walked off, martini in hand to the circle of couches in the middle of the room.

Steve laughed to himself as he made his way over to the pool table where Sam was obviously killing it as he took on some of the Stark interns. 

“On your left.” he said as he came up behind him with a new beer. 

“Oh captain my captain.” he sarcastically said as he took a swig of it and tossed his pool stick to one of the new kids that was watching Sam nervously. “Take over boy, I’ll be back.” glaring at the young man over his shoulder as he followed Steve up the stairs to the balcony that overlooked the party. “What’s up?

“Not much, just wanted to get away for a minute.” he said and leaned on the railing. 

“It’s a good thing you’re pretty because you’re a terrible liar.” Sam said with a smirk. Steve just laughed and ran a hand over his face. 

“I was wondering if you heard anything back from the building in Brooklyn we saw last week.” he said and rolled his eyes. “I know it hasn’t been long but-”

“They called back. It’s expensive, even for today but if you tell them the whole story it might soften the edge.” he said and laughed. “I’d use the ‘sad orphan boys who fell in love after becoming superheroes’ card all the time if I were you. I’m surprised you haven’t used it more.”

Steve just laughed and let himself think. Last week on a small mission with Sam he happened to pass by the old neighborhood he and Bucky grew up in. It wasn’t old anymore, it was actually very new. It seemed pretty hip and relaxed which Steve liked. On their way home he passed by a building with he same address that was on the one they grew up in. After going in with Sam and asking around he learned that they were selling floors as homes after the building had been renovated the previous. Steve had told them to call him if anything opened up but he didn’t think it would be so soon. 

“You’d really want to move all the way out to Brooklyn?” Sam asked and Steve just laughed, tilting his head to scan the room to find Bucky, who was now leaning against the bar with Natasha. 

“What can I say.” Steve said and stood, turning to move back downstairs. “Home is where the heart is.” He said and patted Sam’s shoulder as he headed back downstairs. 

He greeted people and shook more hands as he made his way to the bar, trying to politely move forward to where Bucky was now waiting for him. He noticed that most of the people were quieted down now and on the dance floor. Even Pepper and Tony were having a moment under the warm lights, swaying together to the music that was playing. 

Steve finally reached Bucky and held out a hand. “Dance.”

“Only for you Rogers.” he said as he smiled and interlocked their fingers before moving to the cleared area and dancing with Steve. They moved together and smiled when Tony winked and waved from across the room making the eyes turn to them. 

“You know even after eighty years you’re still a catch.” Bucky said in his ear and Steve smiled. 

“I could say the same to you.” he said and grinned. “Hey.”

“Hey what.”

“I have an idea.” he said and pulled his face back to look at Bucky. “Remember out building in Brooklyn?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“It was renovated last year. They’re selling the floors as homes now.”

“Are they really?”

“Yea.” Steve said and swallowed his nervousness. “I put my name down for one.”

“We’re moving?” Bucky said eyes wide. “Steve you can’t just go buy houses.” he said and shook his head. 

“Bucky it’s not just any house. It’s Brooklyn. It’s home. We can go back, Bucky, we can finally really go back home.” he said and bit his lip, trying to keep more words from falling out.

“What about the Avengers?”

“Us being twenty minutes away won’t kill ‘em.”

“Steve. . .”

“Home, Bucky.”

“What if this is our home now.” he said and furrowed his eyebrows at Steve. “We have a kitchen and a bed and neighbors and jobs and this building has unbelievable security for us. I mean, Steve we would be insane to leave now. Not while we’re just getting back to it.” 

“Bucky.” Steve said and kissed his cheek, not meaning to cause him any distress. 

“Listen Steve. I like it here. This is the first place I’ve ever felt really safe in my whole life. I like the people and the fact that even when we’re apart it’s only by a few floors, not a hundred miles.” he said and smiled. “I know you mean well Stevie, but not now.” he said and kissed him softly. “When we turn 115 we’ll talk about Brooklyn.” he said with a cheeky smile. 

“Thats only seventeen years.”

“Babe, I can promise you we’ll be ready for a commute by then. Plus, did you really want to have to explain to Tony that we’d be moving.” he said and Steve sighed. 

“Why are you always so damn right.” he said and smiled. 

“Because I have you to be wrong.” Buck said with a smile and laughed, looking around the room. “Did you ever think we’d go to another Stark expo?” he asked and looked over at the bright neon sign above the stage. 

“I didn’t think I’d ever have a phone in my pocket or that you’d still look this good at ninety-seven, so no.” he said and Bucky rolled his eyes. Steve was about to say something snarky when something caught the corner of his eye. “Oh my god.”

“What. What is it.” he said, tensing up. 

“Don’t look but Nat is dancing with Fury.” he said and bit his lip to keep himself from laughing out loud with joy. 

Steve spun so Bucky was facing the north wall where sure enough, Natasha was dancing happily with a suited Nick Fury. Bucky just looked at Steve with wide eyes and a smile. 

“Someone better be recording this.”

“JARVIS is getting it from every angle, don’t worry.” Tony said as he glided by with Pepper. She laughed as he spun he around the now almost empty room that was only filled with Avengers and close friends. 

“You still want to move? Because we can’t see amazing things like that if we live in Brooklyn.” Bucky said and Steve couldn’t contain his laughter. Bucky was right; there was too much to leave behind here. They had a family now. People that loved them and protected them. It was safe it it made them happy. They would always have Brooklyn; those long nights shared in a small drafty apartment just learning how to love each other, growing with each other just like the universe had intended them too. But universe had different plans and somehow it had flung them here. To the metal tower in the sky with friends that were gods, assassins, and men created from science. None of it made sense but somehow they fit in and they where home. It was their home.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This doesn't really have a direct plot. It's the rambles of all rambles. Enjoy.

Bucky knew he was hot. 

Steve knew Bucky was hot. He defiantly knew he was hot. When he had first moved in and was going though therapy and treatments he hardly ever wore anything other than baggy long sleeved shirts and jeans, but now it was hard for him to ever get dressed. Steve would walk into the kitchen to make coffee in the morning and find Bucky sitting shirtless reading the paper and eating breakfast in the sunlight. By the end of the summer his skin was golden brown and soft from his days working outside or just sitting on the patio. Steve couldn’t get anything but pink in the same light but Buck always ended up looking like a fucking god. 

His chest was unbelievably toned and his arms hung at his side, strong and somehow soft and graceful. The harsh contrast of silver metal against his skin was beautiful to Steve. It worked easily now that Stark had a chance to work on it Bucky was safe from any malfunctions that might hurt him. It made him feel better about having it, knowing that he wouldn’t randomly be electrocuted from trying to stretch the wrong way. He was safe from himself and was able to enjoy life and the things that made him happy. 

He liked running and boxing with Sam and talking to Tony about Avengers tech. He helped out with missions and jobs a few times a week and talked and ate lunch with other agents. Everyone liked having him around and he liked being able to walk into the building and say hello to people that smiled and saluted him. He liked feeling welcomed and wanted. He liked working for good reasons and helping people make progress. It made him happy, and happy was not something he had for too long. 

Steve made him happy. He knew that for sure. He knew that when he was in the darkest pit of the earth and the deepest depths of hell that Steven Rogers was the greatest thing in the universe. He made him happy and made him feel safe. 

He would come behind him while he was sitting and reading and place a hand on his chest, just letting him know that he was there. He kissed his cheek when they passed in the kitchen and held his hand when the walked down the street. Never ashamed, always there, always confident and so in love. It was hard for Buck at first, to know why Steve cared so much when he had done so much wrong in his life. But then one day he realized, if this was Steve and they switched positions he would do exactly the same thing. He would stay up day and night to make sure he was alright and kiss him and feed him and make sure he felt love and warmth always. 

Steve just smiled and kissed him.

Now Bucky knew he could love himself, and boy did he. He knew he was hot and he liked showing off around the house whenever possible. He would toss his yoga mat out in front of the window across from where Steve was working and stretch and meditate until he heard Steve give up on trying to focus and make his way across the room and pick him up before moving to the bedroom where he’d throw him down on the bed. 

Bucky liked having the attention that Steve gave him, he felt needed and wanted, like he was a part of something. He liked being able to push his body and make himself feel good. He liked being able to eat whenever he wanted to and make sure Steve was eating when he was working. He like not being afraid of his arm anymore and being able to help people with two hands and a stable mind. He liked himself. He was Safe. It was something he never though would ever happen but boy, was he glad it did.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short little snippet that I wanted to do about Bucky getting off on Steve growing out facial hair.

“Honey, I’m home.” Steve called as he dropped his bags by the entrance to their apartment. He heard Bucky’s footsteps run from the bedroom to the living room. 

“Steve! I’m so glad you’re home. I- oh my god.” he said as he came around the corner with a smile and stopped when he locked eyes with his boyfriend. He had only been gone for about three weeks but it was the longest they’d ever been apart since Bucky had moved in and it was taking a toll on them both. Steve called him from wherever he could without being caught but he missed seeing his face. 

“Oh my god, what?” he said and walked towards Bucky holding his arms out to wrap around his waist. 

“You have a beard.” he said and reached a hand up to run a hand along the dark beard that was covering Steve’s jaw. He always, like never took a day off not even in the worst circumstances, didn’t shave and Bucky had never seen him with this much facial hair before. Not even during the war when they lived in tents and ate beans out of cans. 

“Oh yea.” Steve said with a small laugh, Bucky’s hand still resting on his cheek over the hair. “I let it get away from me this time around. Helped with undercover though.” he said and smiled. 

“Huh.” Bucky said and looked at his face with a smirk. 

“What?” 

“Nothing, it just looks a like different, that’s all.” he said and leaned in to kiss him, finally feeling the shape of his perfect mouth against his for the first time weeks. He sighed contently at the familiar feeling but also couldn't help the butterflies in his gut that he felt from the scratch of stubble and beard that were rubbing against his face. He moaned and licked into Steve’s mouth hungrily in response. He bit his lower lip and brought his body closer so that their chests and hips were pressed flush against each other. Steve groaned as Bucky’s hands stayed on his face as they made out and the hard ridge of his cock rubbed against his thigh. 

Steve pulled away and looked at Bucky. “You like the beard.” he said and Bucky just bit his swollen lower lip and nodded as a light blush crept up his cheeks. 

“It’s getting to me.” he said and reached a hand out to scratch the short hairs. Steve leaned into his palm and let him stroke his face as he spoke. “It’s making me think of all kinds of possibilities for beard burn.” he said and rubbed a thumb along his chin.

“Oh I can shave before we go to bed if you want, I don’t mind.” he said and propped his head up to look at Bucky who was already shaking his head in disagreement. “Or not?”

“Don’t even think about it.” he said and smiled before leaning in to kiss Steve’s neck. “I want to know what beard burn feels like. I want that this thing between my legs as soon as possible.” he said and Steve groaned at the thought. 

“I can make that happen.”

“Yea?”

“Oh yea.”

“Let’s go.” Bucky said and Steve dropped everything as he was pulled, running into their bedroom. Bucky was already taking off his clothes and Steve kicked off his boots as he went. The beard had really been a bet with Clint to see if he could the whole mission without shaving and Natasha added another five bucks to the bet when she said Bucky would get off on it. Steve was never happier to loose a bet.


	18. Chapter 18

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Bucky groaned to himself as he pulled at the hair tie that was knotted in the back of his ponytail. Steve was in the shower with him after their work out and laughed as he watched Bucky bit his lip in concentration and tugged at the elastic. 

“Here.” Steve said and replaced Bucky’s hands with his own and helped him untangle. “I got it.” he said and placed the band around Bucky’s wrist. 

“Thank you.” he said and finished rising his hair. “I just need to cut it off.” he said as he switched placed with Steve, placing a hand on his hip as he did. 

“Would you really?” Steve asked as he scrubbed his own short locks under the spray. Bucky had to think about how to respond in full sentences as he watched Steve throw his head back under the water and rinse off. The droplets rolled off his pale skin and Bucky had the sudden urge to lick every single inch of skin. Maybe after work.

“Yea, I guess. Why not? It’s more practical.”

“Hmm.” Steve hummed, already done showering. 

“What does ‘hmm’ mean.” he asked with a smile as Steve came closer so that they were standing chest to chest, Steve arms wrapped around Bucky's waist. 

“Hmm means I think you look hot with any haircut, hell you’d look hot bald, and I think you should do whatever you want.” he said and kissed his ear. 

“I might just.” he said and kissed him softly.

“Just one thing?” Steve said and rested his head on his shoulder, so that he was kissing his neck.

“What’s that, baby?”

“Just leave me something to hold onto.” he said and bit his neck, causing Bucky to groan and let his hands rest on Steve’s ass, kneading it and running his fingers over the soft flesh. 

“I think I can do that.” he said and kissed his ear. 

“Thank you.” he said and kissed the bitten mark on his neck before slowly untangling himself and turning to shut the water off. 

They got out of the shower and moved to dry themselves off before moving to the bedroom where they chatted about what they were going to do that day while they got dressed. Bucky only had a few assignments to finish at home while Steve had to help Tony reassemble a new robot all day. He groaned as he pulled his shirt over his head knowing he would have to spend the rest of the day leaning over a bench knowing that Bucky was upstairs all day. 

“You’ll be fine. Text me if you get bored.” he said and kissed his cheek as he walked him to the door. “I’ll have my ohone near me, okay?”

“Okay.” he said finally and kissed Bucky one more time. “I love you.”

“I love you too, baby. Have a good day. I’ll have food ready when you get home.” he said and kissed his forehead. 

“What would I do without you?” he asked aloud to himself, looking at Bucky’s face with a dreamy gaze. 

“Be on time to work?” he said and looked at his watch. Steve should have been downstairs in the lab two minutes ago. He knew Tony would give him hell if he was any later. 

“True.” he said and moved to the elevator, saluting Bucky as the doors closed. Buck just laughed and moved into the now empty home. He turned the TV on for background noise and moved to him computer that was still sitting on the dining room table from the night before. He sat down and pulled up a file of pictures and videos, his work for that day being put on the back burner. He opened the file and smiled. They were all pictures of him and Steve during the war. He was smaller then but he was next to Steve every step of the way and did everything he did right next to him. He pulled up on video clip of them leaning over the hood of a jeep together looking at a map and laughing. His hair was cut short back then and he had length in the front the he remember he liked being able to run his hands through. It looked good on him, made him look a little more clean cut and professional. 

He picked up the phone that was next to min on the table and called Sam. He was off that day and picked up on the third ring with a laugh. Bucky could practically feel the his smile though the phone as he picked up. 

“What’s up.”

“Where do you get your hair cut?” he asked and Same whistled through the phone. 

“Little place down the block. Family owned, real nice. Want me to come with you?” he asked.

“Yes please.”

“Meet you in the lobby in ten.” he said and hung up. Bucky texted Steve to let him know he was going out, just in case he worried and grabbed his coat and shoes before moving to the elevator. When the doors opened on the lower level Sam was already standing there waiting with a smile and a cup of coffee.

“How do you always beat me down here?” he asked as he took the coffee while Sam laughed and lead them out onto the sold street. 

“I had to take care of some business.”

“You were hitting on the secretary again, weren't you?” Bucky asked. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” he said and looked straight ahead with a smile as they walked down the three blocks to the barber shop. Sam walked in first and shook the had of a young man that was standing behind the counter. He introduced Bucky and he shook his hand warmly and lead him to a seat. 

“What ca I do for you man?” the barber asked as Bucky handed his coat to Sam, who was sitting in an empty seat next to him. 

“Shorter, please. Still some length up from but not too long?” he asked and the barber nodded.

“You want the old school cut.” he said and nodded to himself. He didn’t know what the old school was but it sounded like something he needed.

“Exactly.” he said and let the young man go to work. He talked with Sam to keep himself relaxed as more and more hair fell onto the floor around him. After several minutes of cutting and chopping away at his ponytail the back of his head got run over but a razor to clean it up. The front part of his head was still longer but was short enough that it didn’t bother him. 

“Ta-da.” the barber finally said after about a half an hour of working on Bucky’s head. He looked up and smiled at himself in the mirror. It was perfect. 

“Mr. Barnes cleans up. You look great, man.” Sam said and stood, shaking the hand of the young barber. Bucky stood and followed suit, thanking him and paying, promising that he would come back from now on. 

He followed Sam outside onto the cold street and slid his jacket on, missing his locks for a second as he felt the wind whip around his neck and send a chill down his spine. Sam laughed as he rubbed the back of his neck as they walked quickly back to the tower where Steve was probably waiting upstairs for Bucky, already bored or done with that day’s work. He was excited for him to see it and run his hands though it, to feel him pull on the roots while he went down on him in the kitchen. 

Bucky made a mental note that he should stop think about blowing Steve while he was with Sam.

They arrived back at the tower and parted ways and just as he had expected Bucky’s phone buzzed in his pocket letting him know Steve was home. He smiled and pulled his coat off in the elevator, ready to throw it to the side when he walked in. 

Sure enough the elevator doors dinged open and Bucky walked in and called for Steve, throwing his jacket on the table as he went. “Babe I’m in the kitchen.” he called out. He head Steve’s footsteps approach and he smiled as he came around the corner and stopped in his tracks when he caught his eye. 

“Wow, I, um.” Steve stopped and just stared at him with wide eyes. His whole body was frozen as he looked at Bucky. “You look good, baby. Real good.” he said and swallowed thickly. Looking at Bucky as if he was in pure shock. His face was white and his mouth was hanging open.

“Steve are you okay?” he asked and took a step towards him, extending a hand out to touch him. 

“You look a lot like you used to, that’s all.” he said and nodded. “It just surprised me, that’s all.” he said and reached out to hold the back of his neck in his hand. 

“Do you like it?” Bucky asked shyly and looked down at his feet, away from Steve’s face.

“Baby, of course I do. I love it, you look amazing. You look like you used to.” he said quietly and kissed Bucky;s forehead, encouraging him to lift his head up and look at him. “Not that you needed to. You always look amazing.” he said quickly, making sure that Bucky knew. He held him tighter and kissed him, making sure that he knew he was there for him. 

“I know. I just look like the Bucky that existed before everything happened.” he said with a dry laugh. 

“He’s still in there.” Steve said and kissed his temple. Bucky didn’t miss the sad tone of his voice as he pressed his lips on the short hair above his temple. Before he went in he didn’t even think about how him looking like he did in 1940 would affect Steve. It was like a flashback staring him in the face and he wasn’t sure if he should cry or buy a wig to wear around the house.

“I know he is. He’s just stronger now.” he said and looked at Steve. He was smiling and looked like he could cry. “I’m stronger now.” he said after swallowing thickly.

Steve smiled and his lower lips trembled. He moved “I love you so much.” he said and shook his head, letting a tear fall as he did. “You know that right?”

“Of course I do, baby. I’ve always known.” he said and brought him in for a hug, letting him lean on his shoulder and kiss his neck. “I should have given you a head’s up. I’m sorry.” he said and kissed his head. 

“No, god no. I don’t want you to feel like you have to tell me everything before you do it. You can do anything you want.” 

“I know but this obviously brought up so emotional triggers for you.” he said and stroked the side of his face tenderly. “I should have given you a heads up. You need a hand to hold just as much as I do when it come to getting back to normal, or whatever this is.” he said with a warm smile, gesturing around their apartment. 

“As long as I have your hand to hold I think I’ll be fine.” he said and leaned in to press his forehead on Bucky’s. 

“You will.” he said and nodded. “Till the end of the line.”

“Till the end of the line.” Steve agreed and kissed him softly before sighing and standing up so he was looking at Bucky. He chuckled and reached a hand up to run though the now short hair. “I guess I can’t be too distraught thought.”

“And why’s that?” Bucky said as a smile tugged on the corner of his mouth. 

“You left me something to hold onto.” he said with a wink and Becky groaned slightly and bit his lower lip. 

“You know, we have to out it to the test though to make sure it stands up to the Steve Rogers hair pulling excellence test.” he said and interlocked their fingers as he started walking them through the living room to the hallway that lead to their bedroom. 

“I’m ready for that.” Steve said and walked with him, smiling brightly and laughing at Bucky who was wiggling his eyebrows and walking backwards, bumping into the doorframe and cursing as he went. Sure he looked different, more like he used to, but it was still Bucky. Still Bucky who made Steve laugh and cry and smile and dance in their kitchen on Sunday mornings. He was still there and he was happy and that’s all that really mattered.


	19. Chapter 19

“What do you think about getting a dog?” Steve asked one night as they were laying in bed. Bucky was sitting up against the headboard reading newspaper and Steve was snuggled under his arm with a paperback book in hand. Bucky just smiled as he finished the sentence he was reading and looked down at Steve.

“What made you think of that?”

“I don’t know. I like dogs.” he said and shrugged. 

“We don’t have room. We live in a tower in the middle of manhattan.” he said and ran his fingers absentmindedly up and down Steve’s arm. “Maybe someday when we have more space.”

“That’s true.” Steve said and went back to reading his book. Bucky could tell he was as focused as he had been before though as his foot tapped away at nothing under the covers, sending ripples up the fabric the where they were sitting. “What about a cat?” he asked and Bucky looked down at him. He thought for a moment and shrugged. 

“A cat would be fine. As long as you clean the litter box.” He said and Steve just laughed. 

“Deal. I just want some more life up here. It feels like we live in the middle nowhere.”

“Steve you apartment is in the middle of a tower. We can see the top of the Empire State when we eat breakfast. We do live in the middle of nowhere.”

“The middle for nowhere and the middle of everything all at the same time.” Steve said and craned his neck back to look at Bucky. “It’s a paradox.”

“How poetic.” Bucky said with a chuckle and threw his paper onto the ground next to the bed, reaching for the light as Steve did the same with his book. “Are you really going to get a cat?”

“I don’t know if I’m going to get one. I might just let the right one find me.”

“Let the right cat find you.” Bucky repeated.

“Yep.”

“What are you going to rub yourself in tuna and walk through Brooklyn and let the right one stop by for an interview.”

“I’m not above it.” Steve said and laid himself across Buck’s chest as he turned the light off. He rested his head down and yawned. 

“I’m glad I love you.”

“I love you too.” he said and placed a kiss to the center of his chest and rubbed his stomach. “Night baby.”

“Night Stevie.” he said and closed his eyes. The last thing he heard was Steve’s soft snores and felt soft fingers running up and down his side. 

 

*2 weeks later*

“Bucky! Bucky Barnes!” Steve yelled as he tumbled in from the elevator doors, all smiles and sunshine. He was back from getting his haircut and Bucky made a mental note to run his hands through it later. “You’ll never guess what happened?”

“You got a haircut.”

“Well yes, but guess what else?” he asked, practically bouncing in his place. 

“What did you do?” he asked warily as he started to unzip his coat. 

“Don’t freak out.” he said and proceeded to produce. . .a kitten? Steve pulled the little thing out of it’s place in his coat and held it in his hands. It crawled around and meowed and looked at Steve with big eyes. “I got a cat?”

“Where the hell did you find a cat?” he asked and took a step closer to run a hand over the little head that was spinning around, trying to take in everything. 

“There was a pet store that was holding adoptions from the barber shop so I dropped in to look and this was the only one left. The didn’t know what to do with him so I picked him up. But wait, look at this.” he said and gently lifted the cat so he could turn the opposite side of his head to face Bucky. The little guy was missing his left eye. 

“How the hell did that happen?”

“He was born like that. Doesn’t bother him at all but for some reason it made people less likely to adopt him.” he said and grinned. “What do you think?”

“I think he’s the cutest little sucker I’ve ever seen.”

“Really?”

“Yes. We’re keeping him.” he said and lightly took the cat from Steve. “What’s his name?”

“He doesn’t have one yet, but because he doesn’t have the eye and he looks kind of tough we could name him-”

“Fury?” he asked and Steve just laughed and nodded. 

“Please.”

“Yes. Yes, little Fury welcome to the tower.” he said and let him cuddle against the fabric of his t-shirt. He and Steve moved to the couch and put on a movie to curl up on the couch with the cat. Steve placed his head on Bucky’s lap and let the little kitten crawl around on his chest while Bucky scratched his head. 

“We’re going to be good cat dads.” Steve said as Fury curled up under his chin and fell asleep. Bucky smiled and laughed. “I ordered supplies for him. They’re by the door.”

“Of course you did.” he said and moved his hand to run his hand through Steve’s hair. “He’s going to end up sleeping with us and you know it.”

“I know.” he said and closed his eyes sleepily. “It’s nice to have him though. It makes this place feel more like home?”

“Did it not?”

“No it did, I just always pictured my life a little more calm. I mean after the war and everything in an ideal world I’d live in Brooklyn with you and have a house because we’d be able to afford something nicer than the old apartment. But now I so have you and we live in a tower in the sky in Manhattan, for the love of god, and we have a cat.” he said and shrugged. “It feels more domestic.”

“Hmm.” Bucky said and though about it. If he really though hard enough he could see the little white house down the street from their apartment building and see himself and Steve living easily and being healthy and happy. “I can see it.” he said and nodded. “It’s comforting to always have something to greet you why you get home.”

“More permanent.” he said and nodded. “I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.”

“Me too baby, me too.” he said and rubbed a hand over his forehead as he began to nod off. “Go to sleep baby, I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Promise?”

“Always.” he said and held his hand. “Me and Fury.” he said and squeezed his hand and kissed it. 

“I love you Bucky.”

“I love you too Steve.”


End file.
